tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-43906944798486994992024-02-07T05:18:19.482-08:00Bloggy bloggy bloggyViolet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-65548092553357068962012-04-10T06:41:00.002-07:002012-04-10T06:41:28.149-07:00Violet's Box Has Finally Launched! Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!<br />
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Check out our brand spanker of a website: <a href="http://www.violetsbox.com/">www.violetsbox.com</a>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-22368889273777534882011-12-14T16:44:00.000-08:002011-12-21T02:44:32.454-08:00Violet's Box Website Coming Soon... in 2012!Not long now before Violet's Box's website makes an appearance. Here are some tasters of what's to come when the site launches in January...<br />
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First here's a sneakpeak at one of our wonderful campaign pics of Florence Brudenell-Bruce in an incredible Violet's Box tulle skirt shot by the BRILLIANT Andrew Farrar (way too many adjectives there but I assure you they're <i>all</i> deserved):<br />
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That's all yer getting I'm afraid...<br />
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NOW FOR THE CORSET AMUSE BOUCHE:<br />
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A STARTER OF KIMONOS:</div>
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A MAIN COURSE OF VINTAGE DRESSES:</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hey! Nice 'Beaded Fish Tail'</td></tr>
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I'd be full up by this point as I don't have a sweet tooth and I gave you rather a lot for main... but I suppose you should have a little something to cap off this generous dinner seeing as it is Christmas:<br />
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For those over-eaters amongts you - some deer and butterfly eyelashes as the petit fours.<br />
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Ok I lied - that was merely the tasting menu...</div>
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SEE YOU NEXT YEAR @ WWW.VIOLETSBOX.COM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! </div>
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<br />Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-4491661553034910822011-12-09T04:23:00.001-08:002011-12-09T05:28:17.970-08:00Anyone Who Owns/Runs A Train In This Country SHOULD Be Taken Out and Slowly Tortured THEN Shot in Front of Their Families.... BY Jeremy Clarkson<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;">Just thinking about having to get on a train in this country makes my blood curdle into blue cheese AND THE WORST THING IS WE HAVE NO CHOICE!!!!!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;">Ok, so, the cost is extortionate unless you book 3 months ahead, the distance bears no relation to cost, they are alllllways late and if you forget any part of which there are about 73 (you need a small filing cabinet to keep them organised for any one journey) of your ticket, they not only treat you like a criminal but in no better words:</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;">you're fucked.</span><br />
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Ok Worse Case Sinario: (no real need for this but I don't think using me as an example will get your sympathy vote) Imagine, you're a sweet old American lady and you've saved up your entire pension to make this once-in-a-lifetime trip to quaint ol' England. You decide to walk upon England's mountains green while you're there and book some tickets to Chester from London. It costs you and your husband (he walks with a stick btw, since the knee op.) around £42.90 return for the two advanced first class return tickets you've treated yourself to. 'Gee how reasonable' you think. 'What a treat!' </div>
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Big mistake, BIG mistake. Right, from the word go, 1 of about 23 things can now go wrong. In fact very little can now go right. I'm just going to explain ONE THING that can wrong though...</div>
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<b>1. - You don't realise you have to print the receipt/ticket out and bring it on your journey. It's one of those new e-tickets.</b> </div>
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You tell the train assistant this as you get on the train but ticket collectors are trained in the fine art of bastard-ry and will totally discount the receipt you're showing them on your blackberry purely because it's not on paper. As far as they're concerned, they are blind and you are stupid, lying, and TOTALLY happy to spew cash out of every orifice. What will now happen is you'll say 'Oh dear. But is this receipt not good enough? My husband and I didn't realise you had to print it out.' And they'll say 'No, arm afraid not madam (they are not afraid at this point but getting extremely sexually excited by the prospect of fleecing you in seconds to come). 'Arm afraid Madam, you and your husband are going to have to buy a new one. And because you're buying it on the train arm afraid (There it goes again. No they're <i>not. </i>They're positively mind-wanking with pleasure at this point.) we're going to 'have to' (they don't have to at all) charge you the standard peak fare because you're not allowed to buy them on the train. That'll be £300 please.'</div>
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GASP!!! "Oh no!" you say, "but that's our whole budget for the weekend blown. And we'll have no money for that lovely spa hotel we've treated ourselves to when we arrive." </div>
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"Returning you say?" says the ticket person rubbing their hands together warming them up for another mind wank, "Well you'll need to get a return then. It's cheaper though if you buy a return ticket (trying to sugar coat the dog shit at this point) but obviuosly we'll have to charge you the full onpeak fare as you're buying a onpeak ticket. That'll be £400 in total.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;"> </span>" </div>
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So you hand over your hard-earned pension, then try and find a seat but the train has been seriously overbooked, and because you didn't print your seat reservation out back in July, you don't have one. SO you walk down the train, falling onto the odd person who swears at you, until you find a little bit of filthy carpet space in a partition between two carriages and one small seat near an overflowing bin, outside a loo with a broken door which keeps opening and shutting, which you let your husband sit on while you stand (the journey's 2.5 hours). Moments later a trolley lady (with a particularly irritating accent) tells you you're not allowed to sit there because that space is only for people who booked first class tickets, forgot them and had to rebuy them, AND 'it's health and safety' (whatever that means). So off you move to another partition to find some more filthy carpet space to sit and get some diseases from a carriage down next to 2 drunk Northerners who are downing cans of Carling. (Luckily, because you're American you don't understand their accents but I can assure they're saying 'cunt' a lot.) You go and seat yourself on the floor next to them. At the next station, a young teeanger gets on and asks you to move so she can park her pram there, but this is somewhat of a relief because your limbs are going numb and you've heard the C-word 16 times already and are beginning to guess what it means.</div>
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You hit the halfway point - Birmingham - where your train gets stuck in a tunnel for 40mins, only metres before the station. The train gets very hot and smelly and everyone starts getting angry and larey so you queue up at the buffet to get some refreshment. Just as it's your turn they announce 'the buffet car is now closing' and then another anouncement informs the 1200 hot, angry, smelly, drunk larey people that there is a fault on the line ahead and because of 'health and safety', the train must terminate here where a bus replacement service will take over. The first bus takes an hour to arrive and when it does there's only room for one of you not both, so you have to wait for the next...</div>
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So by the time you arrive at Chester, it's midnight, the only free hotel is one you pay by the hour and your husband has had 2 minor coronaries and needs his other knee replacing.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_udHGT57RspfWvOlVDK4l9fpQ-EnKj_-PZIzgm3jk-MoOjmc6FE_gegglrFtjDihUfcWMS59JCFxH9rWdsBRAc4OEd4Cg974dsUxxxOXWC07XqscHW-eCkY_7WRiwKk071FovfaFVWBb5/s1600/images-1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_udHGT57RspfWvOlVDK4l9fpQ-EnKj_-PZIzgm3jk-MoOjmc6FE_gegglrFtjDihUfcWMS59JCFxH9rWdsBRAc4OEd4Cg974dsUxxxOXWC07XqscHW-eCkY_7WRiwKk071FovfaFVWBb5/s1600/images-1.jpeg" /></a></div>
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So what could've been an romantic insight into English travel - watching the beautiful countryside roll by as you're offered tea and shortbread by the nice trolley lady while a jolly fat ticket man hole punches your ticket with a light-hearted 'ho ho ho' - is actually tantamount to banging your head repetitively against a brick wall, employing someone to squeeze lemon into the wound whilst allowing those little dinosaurs, which look cute but are actually fervent pack hunters nibble at your feet - extremely unpleasant to start off with, gets worse as time goes on and will only cease to be painful when it stops or your die.</div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-7437759850233846292011-11-29T06:04:00.001-08:002011-11-29T06:07:43.643-08:00A DELIGHTFUL POEM BY GRACE PILKINGTON...<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><b>...written on the tube. I'm in love with it.</b></span><div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Oh you, you spacious disabled loo,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Rarely engaged and always bright,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Like Bethlehem's star, on December's night.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">... The other cubicles can't begin to compare,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">They offer nothing, not like you</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Oh you, you spacious disabled loo.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">It's Thursday and I'm going on a date,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Running home would make me late,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I run into Pret, in a minor state,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">your presence will decide my fate.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Please be there darling disabled loo,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">But alas, there is not one of you,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Regretably I join the ladies queue.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Now it's a series of squeezes to endure,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Oh no! my blusher has spilt all over the floor.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I squeeze into my dress,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">My hair an afro mess.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">It smells horrid in here and on me it will stick,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I hear grunts outside 'be quick, be quick'</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I panic, checking my phone to see the hour</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">before I know it, splish, splash splosh.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Yes it's taken my phone the evil loo.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">My mind drifts to memories of you.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I make a promise then,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Never will I cheat.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I will always hunt harder,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">And kneel at your feet.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Oh you, you spacious disabled loo.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">You dearest, darling disabled loo.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">SO special you are to me with your warm embrace,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Your large door handle winks - welcome grace.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">In your fold, I'll hide from the cold,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">And the hostile stare of other loo goers.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Who cannot understand you, or me</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">They are scared of you and think that I am sick</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">But they should choose carefully the fights they pick.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">With your handle bars and alarmed string,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">There's no end to the pain we could bring.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I could do a ninja kick swinging from the bar,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">The string would get us back up from near and far.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">And if there was an armed robbery in the garage store,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I know where I would go - straight to your door.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">You'd let me in and keep me safe,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">And immediately restore my withering faith.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">You wouldn't ask questions or hint for me to leave,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Telling me tales of Narnia, Christmas, Adam and Eve</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">No, the other loos they're just not like you,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">You spacious, darling disabled loo.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">I would never expect priority over you,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">Like you have over me,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">But if anyone asks, I'm dyspraxic</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;">And really need to pee.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px;"> </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 16px;"><br /></span></span></div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-11862600586472462862011-10-21T07:21:00.000-07:002011-10-21T07:21:43.073-07:00Crotchless Pants and a Hand Gun<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Put <i>this </i>on RE-peat and try and concentrate on yer Friday afternoon spreadsheets!</span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/HSpH0syEaME?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
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Told you, you couldn't.<br />
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And the point is....<br />
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Damaris's BEAUTIFUL underwear OF COURSE<br />
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AND that you'll look a whole load better in it with a pump action shot gun.<br />
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Or perhaps that's got something to do with Liberty Ross' arse.<br />
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Tse.<br />
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OucH!<br />
<br />Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-47767938664290831432011-10-13T05:40:00.001-07:002011-10-13T05:40:48.416-07:00AND MIGHT I ADD....<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">... a fuck of a lot better than Tracey Emin's arsing bed.</span>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-13380387117969321112011-10-13T05:37:00.000-07:002011-10-13T05:37:01.802-07:00Nicky Haslam's Bed Who else could have come up with something <i>this</i> fab and <i>this</i> impractacal but Mr Haslam?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjA4em9x3hSQHjolfVoGdpUjNnFPF0jxx7j1wL6BepdFdmbr4lfKswdDeMoPYEN7OYiFqqAyx83K255xEqTAFfaOZHwZdbz-YkAd_YTwedmvDc38U3Hw8jIu3wkbFaI1GwFeC1NamPIM8a/s1600/IMG_2362.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjA4em9x3hSQHjolfVoGdpUjNnFPF0jxx7j1wL6BepdFdmbr4lfKswdDeMoPYEN7OYiFqqAyx83K255xEqTAFfaOZHwZdbz-YkAd_YTwedmvDc38U3Hw8jIu3wkbFaI1GwFeC1NamPIM8a/s640/IMG_2362.jpg" width="476" /></a></div>
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Well, when I found out my bf, one of Nicky's design team Beata Heuman was involved, things began to make sense....<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">A giant gilded sea-bed stolen from beneath the feet of Botticelli's Venus with that all essential lethal carpet of oyster shells, complete with perfect flower fairy model children?</span><b> </b>But of course. </div>
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And it's clear the point is not to make life easy for the upholsterers either:<br />
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What every girl should have in her room - one of these sequinned beer dresses created by desgin GeNiUsEs <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: magenta; font-weight: bold;">Rodnik. </span><span class="Apple-style-span">(Dresses<i> I</i> dream of... and <i>they</i> create!)</span></div>
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And if sold out - only a shark dress will suffice in place of a beer dress:<br />
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with appalling joke going hand-in-hand</div>
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We're moving house soon. Do you think if I just snuck this little number into our bedroom, put our usual cream and floral John Lewis never-knowingly-undersold bedcover on it and plumped up the pillows, my boyfriend would notice?<br />
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I think...<br />
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I could get away with it.<br />
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Yup.<br />
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No question.<br />
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</div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-52976287389286211062011-10-06T03:53:00.000-07:002011-10-06T03:53:17.337-07:00Two Down, One to Go...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Apparently I was always dicing with death Dad's informed me. He just sent this pic. of me in the lagoons of the Mississippi river, having clambered to the front after refusing to stay behind the safety bars so I could get a closer look. (It was even closer than it looks btw.)</div>
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Just need me grinning innanely in front of the jaws of a Great White now. . .<br />
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Not sure that's going to happen though. I've promised mum to stop throwing myself into the jaws of death.Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-60863781993805052262011-10-03T06:40:00.000-07:002011-10-03T06:40:34.857-07:00Turkish Delights!Ok, I thought <i>I'd </i>had some weird and wonderful pets but it seems the Turks have outdone me. The excitement I got from each of these fascinating creatures really took me back to when I was young. Sadly that time has officially ended - according to National Rail.<br />
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From as far back as I have a memory, I longed for a pet like all my friends at school but my parents wouldn't let me have one so instead I kept ants, worms, newts, frogs, stick insects, catterpillas, white bait, hermit crabs, an imaginary fairy named Clatilda (she wasn't really an animal but she did ride on dragonflies for transport), a wild rabbit, (attempted a squirrel, which bit me) and a wild snake UNTIL FINALLY my parents told me if i did better at school or more specifically if I got less black dots for bad behaviour OR at LEAST wasn't the pupil with the <i>most</i> black dots for ONE TERM, they'd buy me an actual pet from an actual pet shop.<br />
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So at the end of term I managed to be 3rd rather than 1st for bad behaviour and when I got home there was a letter waiting for me. (Being 9, you don't get many letters, bills, bank statements etc.) When I opened it I saw it was a card in my mum's writing. On the front it read '1 voucher for' and inside she'd drawn a picture of a rabbit. I literally FREAKED OUT, i was so excited. It was the most exciting thing that had happened to me in my life so far (in my opinion). So at the weekend, my mum took me to Pet City (the stuff of dreams aged 9) and we chose a beautiful silky coated black dwarf rabbit, who I named Millie. She came home in a cardboard box with holes in, she was teeny and her ears touched the ground.<br />
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BUT Millie, rather than satiating my fascniation with animals, only left me hungry for more (Gerard Durrel didn't help either), so whenever one died, another replaced it. I think in total I had 3 rabbits, 8 hamsters (I bred them at the end of my parents bed to their horror and they had 6 babies to their further horror), 2 rats and a budgie...<br />
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And I've been begging Charlie to let me get a tortoise for a while now but he won't approve it so I"m biding my time...<br />
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Anyway, during my trip to Turkey, we encountered some WONDERFUL creatures I'd like to share with you...<br />
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Every one was unexpected!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Look who came to visit during breakfast in our hotel Atelya, in Antalya? </td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Charlie fed it grapes until it spat one out. Do they eat grapes?</span></td></tr>
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Next on the menu was a white rabbit but INFURIATINGLY i didn't have my camera. I was shown it by the restauranter who cooed at it, stroked it, let me stroke it, then he offered to cook it. </div>
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Here's a picture of a similar bunny for those unimaginative among you...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0L8kJ-Nl06aPguadWAK18gM-79nSc1WxFO8rTcvww0DFbJzW35dAJu7BGRQIU6_aE0reUnAFKPRwey6eTdaq9Xd6rb6wBslo6JEUyaGFlYMrJNooQ0PW6548Hai0kPpFPidnNRsfmphrK/s1600/WhiteBaby3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0L8kJ-Nl06aPguadWAK18gM-79nSc1WxFO8rTcvww0DFbJzW35dAJu7BGRQIU6_aE0reUnAFKPRwey6eTdaq9Xd6rb6wBslo6JEUyaGFlYMrJNooQ0PW6548Hai0kPpFPidnNRsfmphrK/s320/WhiteBaby3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I didn't eat it, in case you were wondering</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One of 6 kittens hanging out on a restaurant roof terrace. Fortunately this wasn't offered up as part of our Meze.</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVzI_DYKOb39I5q0Gic59aVasX5YlxLn-5LEIqchinNEHUdOmev7mh1l_KzEjCSPcotNd3O-gP9wDd5PvhI36nF3uXmESwlJuvE98Fe4lDBVTnvja3wm1ZfxtsnE3bbfUkEEMR1oQ7Xs-S/s1600/IMG_1932.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVzI_DYKOb39I5q0Gic59aVasX5YlxLn-5LEIqchinNEHUdOmev7mh1l_KzEjCSPcotNd3O-gP9wDd5PvhI36nF3uXmESwlJuvE98Fe4lDBVTnvja3wm1ZfxtsnE3bbfUkEEMR1oQ7Xs-S/s400/IMG_1932.jpg" width="298" /></a></div>
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This monkey belonged to a very fat grumpy Turkish man staying on the same sucluded beach as us in a tiny coastal village called Ecincek (pronounced Ekinchek). He had the little thing on a lead attched to him at all times, and it was forever biting at the lead and trying to escape. I've never felt so sorry for an animal. We couldn't work out which region of Turkey he was from and had to admit we hadn't seen any clambering through the trees on our way down. Finally someeone managed to translate what fatty grumpy Turk was saying - astonishingly it turned out the monkey'd been shipped all the way from Indonesia. </div>
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As soon as we walked over to look at it, it immediately jumped from the man's back onto Charlie's arm and refused to return to its owner, who got very annoyed and thought Charlie had prompted ir to do so. (Charlie's laughing because the man is getting angrier and angrier and the monkey refuses to move.)</div>
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AND FINALLY for one of the most awe-inspiring creatures I have ever seen that made my heart leap into my mouth and stay there for several mintues.....</div>
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...this surreal and beautiful prehistoric-looking creature, 'the giant turtle'. It was around 5ft in length, and over 80-yrs-old; it swam incredibly fast and came up to snap at the dangling crab our boatman was offering him. With a mouth that looked just like a dinosaur's, it made a sound like a carraca as it snapped. I was mesmorised...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJF0Rwt89m_iGaLAxzPpFNCClOGy7jMDG9KcmQJ21hjviq0CS_PFyn2zeO8goGZJYzs9TxymZZdO1FETnUmDXwT4Qyb0oRz05Hmvpy4gknG4U4RkMz7oXUag1AlOJWAOO6PysbGh1FDUNM/s1600/IMG_1992.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJF0Rwt89m_iGaLAxzPpFNCClOGy7jMDG9KcmQJ21hjviq0CS_PFyn2zeO8goGZJYzs9TxymZZdO1FETnUmDXwT4Qyb0oRz05Hmvpy4gknG4U4RkMz7oXUag1AlOJWAOO6PysbGh1FDUNM/s640/IMG_1992.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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....and typically I couldn't stand back and just watch so I launched myself over the side to get closer to it. Here is a picture below of me stroking its head as it snapped at the crab just before it swam off into the deep.</div>
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When we got back to the hotel, we sat drinking delicious Efes beer and looking out to sea while I googled more about the turtles. </div>
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One fact, we'd not banked on was that after the great white and the alliagator, these turles have the most powerful bite in the world....</div>
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<br />Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-90952070265265289262011-09-09T03:15:00.000-07:002011-09-09T03:15:32.814-07:00Someone's Been Reading Bloggy bloggy bloggy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBlPsgkzecZPig-srVk-Hc9FdmVKkHzqlv3jgxwlk6hetOA-InPryzhWM5r2zzmq6AaxMNzU4czMJuBk_Fa5Z2HckIFR1QsoffEsxrqw0z_WpO3nMeGyfXLbvqwloJ4esE87DTSK6dEaRr/s1600/Spectator+full.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBlPsgkzecZPig-srVk-Hc9FdmVKkHzqlv3jgxwlk6hetOA-InPryzhWM5r2zzmq6AaxMNzU4czMJuBk_Fa5Z2HckIFR1QsoffEsxrqw0z_WpO3nMeGyfXLbvqwloJ4esE87DTSK6dEaRr/s640/Spectator+full.jpeg" width="456" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-44323858355293714392011-09-06T03:50:00.000-07:002011-09-06T03:50:07.785-07:00FOOD PORNDo you remember what you had for lunch last week? Last year?<br />
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Well, in my case, I never forget what's launched into my mouth because if it was worth remembering, I record it.<br />
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This is something my boyfriend discovered early on in our relationship and it has taken him a while to get used to and accept over the years. I've always thought it entirely normal. It's not just my food, but his food, other peoples food, food at dinner parties, sometimes people in restaurants' food, food I see on the side of the road, or in a shop, it all gets photographed - nothing escapes the net - food that's still alive or that looks repulsive, even better phallic (this of course <i>is </i>normal and also extends to plants, vegetables, sweets, furniture well anything really that's looks remotely like a willy and is therefore hilarious).<br />
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Generally, food that looks wonderful and appears in large quantities excites me. I think because I am one half Naylor-Leyland one half Lambton, and as far back as I know, we have all been extremely greedy. My grandfather ate scalding hot melted cheese with a fork (i wish he'd used a spoon because it always went all over my head); my grandmother whipped cream out of a brandy snap cornet; my brother ate half an entire brie once (yes those Frence ones, 12 inch in diameter), hallucinated for 8 hours, cried and thought he was going to die (but didn't I'm glad to say); I have on more than one occasion been taken to the doctors with suspected appendicitis (which turned out to be indegestion - unbelieeeeevably embarrassing); my father has had the Heimlich Maneuver administered on him on various occasions due to swallowing without chewing; and I don't think my mother would ever speak to me again if I told you what she got up to when no one's in the kitchen. So my obsession with food is actually not my fault but can be blamed on genetics, or just simply and fairly, like everything, on my parents.<br />
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So here goes with the most exciting food encountered (and where necessary explained) by me over the past 18 months. It goes in a kind of 'Yum to Yuk' order:<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The argentinian way to eat/crucify your sheep, yet this was on someone's lawn in Wiltshire. Deliciously succulent, not dry at all and rather beautiful even if it did remind me a little of an ovine Jesus.<br />
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<div style="text-align: left;"><b>TUSCANY, ITALY:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXC3GWHxnxGfrQ4q3BKcgvTcj9BW3wO0JA2d8i39xNz2so0S2BV8l9cVFu8Vi6M5QA_QpEQTYBl-ROrcCwy-LXVIagdOcBmsqRtVGn3aLFhRkJ7mTv1EYacPLSy3beLe4_lQUrhzR5FdLi/s1600/Blackberry+4.09.2011+277.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="477" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXC3GWHxnxGfrQ4q3BKcgvTcj9BW3wO0JA2d8i39xNz2so0S2BV8l9cVFu8Vi6M5QA_QpEQTYBl-ROrcCwy-LXVIagdOcBmsqRtVGn3aLFhRkJ7mTv1EYacPLSy3beLe4_lQUrhzR5FdLi/s640/Blackberry+4.09.2011+277.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The close up</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><b>UMBRIA, ITALY:</b></div></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_6P3w9BYB8PMzwtx9r2GfbhVkVdAqnUA3JaR19dqkR3C2fkXXFQX_ve3FWYiJTH-hRnDhmC0gzWWEbjaFJEij2sMG1XyQvytshoWXskB8OExE2hy90GZAz4IaclwmCezd9mCVkDNHJh-0/s1600/IMG_1528.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_6P3w9BYB8PMzwtx9r2GfbhVkVdAqnUA3JaR19dqkR3C2fkXXFQX_ve3FWYiJTH-hRnDhmC0gzWWEbjaFJEij2sMG1XyQvytshoWXskB8OExE2hy90GZAz4IaclwmCezd9mCVkDNHJh-0/s640/IMG_1528.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">These magnificently voluminous sugary bosoms I discovered at the front of a Pasticceria in a hilltop town in Umbria. It took some persuading me not to pack them in my suitcase as presents. In hindsight I may have been well advised.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCVzQx1sTo0bBPBUVm92dHrkjaQ4pzE6_oFsPRHRmsWoblGSb-2nTgdRLSbX1aQVOmodvdP_jghNVlCaGyPU135xm0z5uiHu2oPX_hVJxjJolUsLQ2aMqiBxEa_hs14mUlNhdpMyE_3vzW/s1600/IMG_1527.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCVzQx1sTo0bBPBUVm92dHrkjaQ4pzE6_oFsPRHRmsWoblGSb-2nTgdRLSbX1aQVOmodvdP_jghNVlCaGyPU135xm0z5uiHu2oPX_hVJxjJolUsLQ2aMqiBxEa_hs14mUlNhdpMyE_3vzW/s400/IMG_1527.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">They sure were!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>LONDON:</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAuBCu5BwOAYyu9HJSpqCPT0AVVPahdfumWyeC8iVFRhJO5eAIwNonPXtL73DFX5gcsfAFtM-Wg075_zqsDjjhYllddxFh30fab5YfX-tmpwPW7ls02FVVjw8R0n3WRHA2MfNh2JgOVoKj/s1600/IMG_1075.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAuBCu5BwOAYyu9HJSpqCPT0AVVPahdfumWyeC8iVFRhJO5eAIwNonPXtL73DFX5gcsfAFtM-Wg075_zqsDjjhYllddxFh30fab5YfX-tmpwPW7ls02FVVjw8R0n3WRHA2MfNh2JgOVoKj/s640/IMG_1075.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A delectable jean stand at the Village Bicycle boutique in London<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWbQweJ4KLb-FX1od7IxvHT5Czsql2JQg2_GJ5b_glwBuwgOQze9tnanrZeikdswH6eBtNR_DoAiw52l87hZbzBpDB_ew4BVpkcGyFYIFL4f-16AMGCV-oomLgN3I1zHG-qaQzOkaa6rLD/s1600/IMG_1081.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWbQweJ4KLb-FX1od7IxvHT5Czsql2JQg2_GJ5b_glwBuwgOQze9tnanrZeikdswH6eBtNR_DoAiw52l87hZbzBpDB_ew4BVpkcGyFYIFL4f-16AMGCV-oomLgN3I1zHG-qaQzOkaa6rLD/s640/IMG_1081.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Its close up. Think I used to dream about swimming through this as a child.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<b>BANGKOK, THAILAND:</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiowe1cYL3P6kghFPdKSNjOZHu_q9YdcoNwAlBGKccmHJMdzrxhF32o_gExM6eP-MyJZcuPayyIkWgDs7MRzAGoWfB3DPQ6TScoknkAZRywhpLTvyaLbnRvyRY3V3J3gclGgLSQ0RKsTrp0/s1600/DSCF0309.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiowe1cYL3P6kghFPdKSNjOZHu_q9YdcoNwAlBGKccmHJMdzrxhF32o_gExM6eP-MyJZcuPayyIkWgDs7MRzAGoWfB3DPQ6TScoknkAZRywhpLTvyaLbnRvyRY3V3J3gclGgLSQ0RKsTrp0/s640/DSCF0309.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Wonderful little pastry cakes I found in the Siam Centre in Thailand just before it was blown up by rioters</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>Now time for some less ravishing but no less fascinating looking food photogrpahy...</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This dainty dish below was a type of Thai fondu we foud on the side of the road (at a street restaurant just outside the night market in Bangkok). Although it looks a bit terrifying, it was in fact delicious and an ingenious alfresco type of cooking I'd not come across. You start with a dense lump of pig fat which is placed at the top of this grated pyramid, underneath which are red hot coals, then as it melts, it coats the pyramid in fat ready to receive your first bit of meat or fish.</div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOXizRVPByrsMCYKSaLMzC9MWf5dEUswxFZYV4no4VCsPbZN4W1oiFmTivMpW-Q1gEtL-oWC2fgIAH9LJbe59y_FzHwFqX2wojCUQ9EPezOmJdwZaBNKtMwcBtWd1y-a4P9aoO8P0s3o11/s1600/DSCF0096.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOXizRVPByrsMCYKSaLMzC9MWf5dEUswxFZYV4no4VCsPbZN4W1oiFmTivMpW-Q1gEtL-oWC2fgIAH9LJbe59y_FzHwFqX2wojCUQ9EPezOmJdwZaBNKtMwcBtWd1y-a4P9aoO8P0s3o11/s640/DSCF0096.JPG" width="640" /></a><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Then came the slightly terrifying bit - the buffet choice! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Up at the buffet table were rows and rows of little iced tupperware boxes filled with every type of meat and piece of fish you could imagine and a hell of a lot we couldn't. Slices of beef, lamb, chicken, pork, squid, prawn, octopus, puffer fish, pink fish, bits of fish still with eyes and some terrifying objects that looked like the innards of an octopus but were we 'think' tripe - going by the gesticulations and noises of the resuranteur's sons who tried to explain by pointing to their stomachs and made a sound that sounded a bit like a moo or an oink... might've been a eeyore and a whoof, but we sort of blocked that possibilty out. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Either way, we were squeamish - and tried it all!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisnPzpieOo0PDoSwn33t5IOXc3erIO3WCdzL9GgW2Z2cRRKgg5mxlSzR7cheoDGAuAMvyhSLIue3vSFSDJvYf4Zm3mo0bs_jZeQwE8fZCADyncaCEBg82UrLhKymtfqOsOlEHlUF4STFUV/s1600/DSCF0098.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisnPzpieOo0PDoSwn33t5IOXc3erIO3WCdzL9GgW2Z2cRRKgg5mxlSzR7cheoDGAuAMvyhSLIue3vSFSDJvYf4Zm3mo0bs_jZeQwE8fZCADyncaCEBg82UrLhKymtfqOsOlEHlUF4STFUV/s640/DSCF0098.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Here I am, living up to my reputation - eating so quckly I'm actually blurred</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">About 15 dips and sauces were available and as we found out, the best plan was not to ask but to try, although one was so hot I had to ask for something to cool my mouth down. Gesticulating, 'it's hot in my mouth -help!' by panting and waving your hand in front of your mouth, whilst your eyes and nose are watering, evidently doens't mean the same in Thailand though, beacuse they looked puzzled for 10 minutes then finally went off to the kitchen and brought another little bowl (which i hoped might contain some soothing yoghurt or milk) of chilli.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">The best part was the moat at the bottom, which had been filled with water to begin with and became a delicious bouillon by the end. Although by that point 'you've made your bed/bouillon, you've now got to lie in it/eat it' sprang to to mind.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKd1AMCOHdZhZ8nm1K-3nJzYYgXWdX4tenEwgkyjwa6bJEaRxnYsiE_dUhAhdwzpdCwxKzApcj17-1XVE4KY9o6q6wXqECqzkGwxX824nfICNrIr6AkLGENap9PIqCrMbRtKR-vSrduk8D/s1600/DSCF0307.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKd1AMCOHdZhZ8nm1K-3nJzYYgXWdX4tenEwgkyjwa6bJEaRxnYsiE_dUhAhdwzpdCwxKzApcj17-1XVE4KY9o6q6wXqECqzkGwxX824nfICNrIr6AkLGENap9PIqCrMbRtKR-vSrduk8D/s400/DSCF0307.JPG" width="300" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Charlie tucking into his 2nd 'Chicken Ceasar Salad Hot Dog' also from the Siam Centre, Bangkok. He thought he'd found heaven. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Disgusting boy. Wrong wrong wrong.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFSjPbNzlWajJOn5hCfSu-ukCPQ18dCaiSAQqyv3QLptTOKQL8VpFKXz-7py5xZ6f6rqrwYN8ruzI9zNaFvGRn79b79z76JbOUN2qd0ibCLCFZIO1eYUfOr-R0lk5JaTOu3LAA4jJ5JtEP/s1600/DSCF0343.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFSjPbNzlWajJOn5hCfSu-ukCPQ18dCaiSAQqyv3QLptTOKQL8VpFKXz-7py5xZ6f6rqrwYN8ruzI9zNaFvGRn79b79z76JbOUN2qd0ibCLCFZIO1eYUfOr-R0lk5JaTOu3LAA4jJ5JtEP/s640/DSCF0343.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Right right right</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>Now for the less than appertising....</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><b>MISCELLANEOUS DESTINATIONS, EARTH </b>(believe it or not):</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhponTCiqgd0agQLQe7hA8iDTLwXEPK49B2e1k_G6GlqJphJH6oPqa6jHb5r09k85oHBhqu_LdFxKpZyfGxK3LV0a0IXLSS1BRLMNXq38jBND5jnPUb9DREGU0uazIBvW9FpgRZ_pdAkb3I/s1600/DSCF0189.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhponTCiqgd0agQLQe7hA8iDTLwXEPK49B2e1k_G6GlqJphJH6oPqa6jHb5r09k85oHBhqu_LdFxKpZyfGxK3LV0a0IXLSS1BRLMNXq38jBND5jnPUb9DREGU0uazIBvW9FpgRZ_pdAkb3I/s320/DSCF0189.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">These were alive and jumping. Fresh - I'll give them that.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwR9mGcApSrCHymAY2pBXEAIYme2uUeozdv8W6z-uzvC4WanOoW17Csce61NQjm4JhzxUnCBm0_2utamU4Esyt1h__11SKtBps3QLDDGWz3ezL104hZll33bq3kWPR8lEkwcMRIo9Nq2le/s1600/DSCF0190.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwR9mGcApSrCHymAY2pBXEAIYme2uUeozdv8W6z-uzvC4WanOoW17Csce61NQjm4JhzxUnCBm0_2utamU4Esyt1h__11SKtBps3QLDDGWz3ezL104hZll33bq3kWPR8lEkwcMRIo9Nq2le/s640/DSCF0190.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Alive also - these giant clambering toads I found next to the veg and fish stalls in a little Thai village market. Perhaps they eat them like jacket potatoes over there...</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">AND LASTLY, food that's so repulsive it makes you laugh...<br />
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3-sl1P8tCJmABm0zEjUAfnVGX9R2oxv5thzgnSQ0Bdo-_GRrY4Q-LDwwHPcozI9KGjvNyXjKgGUuliTMJufjRKj7xGUhlrP237I-6nrcwLyNmfzWfwvJp3_p7IBbyhBQ6OzZ_rDYSNHU7/s1600/DSCF0069.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3-sl1P8tCJmABm0zEjUAfnVGX9R2oxv5thzgnSQ0Bdo-_GRrY4Q-LDwwHPcozI9KGjvNyXjKgGUuliTMJufjRKj7xGUhlrP237I-6nrcwLyNmfzWfwvJp3_p7IBbyhBQ6OzZ_rDYSNHU7/s400/DSCF0069.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This was our Thai Airways breakfast, which tasted as bad as it looked</td></tr>
</tbody></table></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTinrz9DtRB83QyyqPguroEDipvCWwAMCx869FN5IjYo4IETx70w2ahTa0O0siXlBAe3Cw6hocxo2r3IH8JhnER1cMl3sjWOixyRxnxtVKF2i9gKGoVFzyvR4PLuzeDAcjYt3PGeNgSE35/s1600/IMG_1311.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTinrz9DtRB83QyyqPguroEDipvCWwAMCx869FN5IjYo4IETx70w2ahTa0O0siXlBAe3Cw6hocxo2r3IH8JhnER1cMl3sjWOixyRxnxtVKF2i9gKGoVFzyvR4PLuzeDAcjYt3PGeNgSE35/s640/IMG_1311.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">These delightful little 'soft' baguettes were being sold packaged on the dry shelf (NOT EVEN REFRIDGERATED - gahhhhhh!) at a Japanese food fair in London. So so digusting looking, give me a frogcket potato with baked beans and cheese anyday.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
Suitably repulsed?<br />
My job here is done.<br />
<br />
</div><div><br />
</div></div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-1583508999426133592011-08-16T03:02:00.000-07:002011-08-16T03:02:06.269-07:00'A Short Story' (well it's rather long for a blog but short for a book)I was on my way back from pilates the other day when an elderly gentleman on a mobility scooter came flying towards me.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhps165gbac2tn45nUWmNj-AUFzDxFNxSmL4aT4gj8EyM1jRCwBDR-h5vglhVIvDh7cBisN0-PCuX_RbbWdNWWSixjK7lsvERdJ74FVtlZS0mO9cuTDJJwcaKwBwFhMI1_2UtypiJj5NMek/s1600/yoga-poses-nui.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="293" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhps165gbac2tn45nUWmNj-AUFzDxFNxSmL4aT4gj8EyM1jRCwBDR-h5vglhVIvDh7cBisN0-PCuX_RbbWdNWWSixjK7lsvERdJ74FVtlZS0mO9cuTDJJwcaKwBwFhMI1_2UtypiJj5NMek/s320/yoga-poses-nui.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is not me. I can not touch my toes, let alone my head with my foot. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>I was right in the middle of texting in that malcoordinated way you do when walking, focusing closely on your fingers and nearly avoiding lampposts. As I dodged out of the way to avoid my shins being lacerated by the pensioner, the seated gentleman asked if I had a phone. As it was darned obvious i had a phone as I was <i>using</i> my phone, I thought to myself ho ho, this fellow wants to have a little joke so I decided to play along; holding up my phone I said 'Nope, fraid not! No phone!'<br />
<br />
As I smirked at my ingeniously clever and quick-witted response to his joke, he looked increasingly worried and said 'Oh dear! Scuse me Sir - do you have a phone?' to the man behind.<br />
<br />
Realising the joke had not been well received and the the man was definitely over 80 so perhaps had poor eyesight and hadn't <i>seen </i>my phone in the first place - or my shins come to think of it, I quickly retracted my comment: 'Yes. Yes I do have a phone. It's right here. I was just joking. Do you need to call someone?' I said. He informed me his scooter was running out of batteries and asked if I could call the AA.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnD815t5NtC1tDEXlL-h1aJaPfox2HLzQ7k01R97SngjTb3Bt38zUqin3xV2-M_7-ClhZdIa1F5-eTz-c__K2AKL6pxi_8OJlKqbmswXZDr16f25K5Lk1zqzLe5wt0BJ8ZEycKmmEBfnRh/s1600/aa_van.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="233" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnD815t5NtC1tDEXlL-h1aJaPfox2HLzQ7k01R97SngjTb3Bt38zUqin3xV2-M_7-ClhZdIa1F5-eTz-c__K2AKL6pxi_8OJlKqbmswXZDr16f25K5Lk1zqzLe5wt0BJ8ZEycKmmEBfnRh/s320/aa_van.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
'Ha HAA!! I thought. I've been had again! 'Very amusing,' I said 'The AA - eh?'<br />
<br />
'I am NOT having you on! came the reply, now even more annoyed.<br />
'My scooter's run out, I'm a member of the AA, I'd like them to come and fix it, so can you PLEASE call them!!' My face reddening by this point, I dutifully picked up my phone, googled the AA and called them.<br />
<br />
The conversation went as follows <i>'If you have a car press -1.... if you are calling about a motorbike press 2..... if you are calling about a caravan or heavy vehicle press 3....' </i>The options started wearing thin and as Mr May was sitting glaring at me, finally I pressed 2 for bike and then hoping to redeem my earlier stupidity somewhat I launched striaght into: 'Yes. I have a Mr May here. He'd like you to come and fix his mobility scooter immediately!<br />
'Sorry madam - what did you say?'<br />
'His mobilty scooter. It's broken down. Can you send someone?'<br />
'Sorry, madam. What kind of scooter - did you say?'<br />
'A mobility scooter - one of those scooters you might use if you've become immobile.'<br />
'Is this a prank phone call?'<br />
<br />
'NO NO!! It isn't. I've got Mr May here who says he's a member and you've come to fix it before.... Could you check his details?'<br />
<br />
'Madam, whether he's a member or not, we don't provide a breakdown service for mobility scooters.'<br />
Mr May is at this point tugging on my t-shirt saying 'They do, they do! She doesn't knowww. Speak to someone else!'<br />
So I ask if she's made a mistake so she asks her colleague. He confirms he's just asked their manager and all three are quite sure they don't provide emergency breakdown for mobility scooters.<br />
<br />
Alas, I put down my phone and must return to my new friend the bad news.<br />
<br />
He looks very annoyed and suggests I send for his nurse to come and charge the mobility scooter instead. As I begin 'I'm afraid I don't have her number... he reaches into his pocket and pulls out 2 brand new mobile phones saying HERE! Call her on one of these.<br />
<br />
By this point, I'm expecting Ashton Kutcher to appear and tell me I've been punked. I look around but there seems to be no sign of Kutcher, so slightly cross-eyed I decide it's best not to bring Mr May up on this point, and upset him further so I just attempt the ON button dubiously with one of the phones and to my surprise Ping!! on it goes, with FULL battery and a screenpicture of its owner in the same uniformed outfit grinning proudly on his mobility scooter.<br />
<br />
His nurse, it turns out, is from the Royal Hospital, Chelsea. She expresses great surprise when I inform her one of her pensioners is heading for the A4. She explains Mr. May has been unwell and just had his scooter returned to him that morning - a the condition of his recovery. Evidently, he'd got so excited, he'd just gone APESHIT and was heading for Reading.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_ymoMrf_oRgDnQs_XRcUWMgA27iN0KzQNiUJCwVK7NgAvYDzKKr8jy6GrKhtzkqXFG14s3GYTyIod8mrtwiXesUBQ7OupkQwmfLe71cHQYtexVtIkUmq9ajOwkOO1jENNYHr9NmYMNgDu/s1600/nurse1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="257" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_ymoMrf_oRgDnQs_XRcUWMgA27iN0KzQNiUJCwVK7NgAvYDzKKr8jy6GrKhtzkqXFG14s3GYTyIod8mrtwiXesUBQ7OupkQwmfLe71cHQYtexVtIkUmq9ajOwkOO1jENNYHr9NmYMNgDu/s320/nurse1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>But the nurse also tells me there's no one to pick him and the scooter up so could I put him in a cab and leave the scooter on the Earls Court Road. This I suggested to Mr May but there is NO WAY he is leaving his scooter on the Earls Court Road which I kind of agree with so I suggest he come with me to my flat nearby on the remainder of his battery and we sit there until my boyfriend gets back from work, when we can give him and his scooter a lift back.<br />
<br />
Typically it was the ONE day Charlie was late - 45 miins to be exact and I couldn't get hold of him then my phone ran out of batteries. So I sat with Mr May outide my flat, chatting to him. He told me he had lived in Blackpool and worked on the buses before giving up his pension and moving into the RHC. In my igorance, I'd thought Chelsea pensioners were people who'd always lived in Chelsea but this is not the case at all (if you still trust what Mr May says by this point).<br />
<br />
As there was no sign of Charlie and no sign of the chat subsiding and I had a deadline for 6pm (which i was about to miss) I begrudgling persudad him to jump in a cab but on the one condition - that I stayed with his scooter until it could be moved from the pavement. So off he went and 10 mins later Charlie arrived to find this...<br />
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</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Understanably his immediate reaction was WHAT THE F***! Have you killed an old person?!<br />
<br />
As he helped me drag it off the pavement I tried to explain about Mr May, (Charlie seemed dubious. HIs view was the man was obviously trying it on with me - typical) THEN I had to explain to my boss why I'd missed my deadline (it must have sounded a pretty unlikely excuse - i wouldn't have believed me) THEN I had to explain to my friend why I was late for dinner (again he just raised his eyebrows and told me sit down). So, admittedly I did feel a little like I'd made it up....<br />
<br />
......UNTIL about 4 days later i received this letter, which had an official stamp on it - one I didn't recognise until I looked closely and saw this:<br />
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<br />
And a letter (i've swapped his name for privacy purposes):<br />
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So apart from feeling a 'little' guilty about dobbing in Mr May so soon after he'd started joy-riding again, I now know that good things come to those who abduct pensioners' mobility scooters.<br />
<br />
I will be booking a tour in Sept. and shall report back. Can't wait!<br />
<br />
<br />
Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-36856672110416087482011-06-10T03:19:00.000-07:002011-06-10T03:19:11.381-07:00IT's A LONG WAY TO TIPPERAREEEE... and Jamaica it seems. Huh who'da thought?The limited edition 'Basil's Bar' at The Goring hotel is FAB if you haven't been. You're advised to wear beach clothes, and I'd strongly advise taking that advice. I poopooed this advice and regretted it.<br />
Let me put it this way - would you wear tights and shoes on a beach? No you re-heeally would not. Well, then don't here unless you want to feel like a total penis, aka m o i !<br />
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<br />
It's meant to be the exact replica of a well-loved watering hole in Mustique called Basil's Bar (never bin). They really have gone to town on recreating it as far as i can tell - gone is the grass <i>and</i> the Middletons and now there are washed-up boats, a shark's skeleton, these wonderful signs and even Basil himself has been seen wandering about (or perhaps I just got a bit over-excited and imagined him).<br />
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Anyway the signs were too tooooo much not to post....<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My GOD this makes me want to jump on a plane right now, fly to Mustique, go to this bar and prod one of the staff to see what happens</td></tr>
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</div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-62059358361993976392011-06-08T03:05:00.000-07:002011-06-08T03:05:36.384-07:00FOOD THEATRE - IN THE SUBWAY<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtJVPSyCv6eKdJasFY0NLrIbtsg7xsN4zg3NPO58G-1lsKOB0a691D5PVaAyqdV-J9eoHBSYuIj79Kng0r4bNH6ra34qGLvT4wB0J_idO_czYHsyWb2bjV1FZGRt6Emlg5r3pOSrwv1eW7/s1600/UM+Internal+Length.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtJVPSyCv6eKdJasFY0NLrIbtsg7xsN4zg3NPO58G-1lsKOB0a691D5PVaAyqdV-J9eoHBSYuIj79Kng0r4bNH6ra34qGLvT4wB0J_idO_czYHsyWb2bjV1FZGRt6Emlg5r3pOSrwv1eW7/s320/UM+Internal+Length.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">FINALLY</span>, somewhere in south west London in fact <i>central</i> London to go food shopping. Unlike Wholefoods, which has irriatingly over the top packaging, large portions and just screams WAAASTE... yes - WAAAASTE really loudly, whenever you go in there. However magnificent the spectacle, i mean who needs an entire gallon of guacamole washed down with a crate of ostrich eggs and family-sized bucket of melon pieces at one million pounds per kg - huh? I don't. But this place really hits the nail on the head.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjI_-e6YtYjzjIkildMIMF6NODQGgFq4lETbbiI1eygh1UYQpo8fV0OeCiWVTxNMwyGodNkDv02DDj-4wX6Og7DMV-1Gr5LzyrhNe6w1-BTuEDjwT_5i3GrFsvLn1NKz5JHDycNwnCBfADd/s1600/IMG_1168.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjI_-e6YtYjzjIkildMIMF6NODQGgFq4lETbbiI1eygh1UYQpo8fV0OeCiWVTxNMwyGodNkDv02DDj-4wX6Og7DMV-1Gr5LzyrhNe6w1-BTuEDjwT_5i3GrFsvLn1NKz5JHDycNwnCBfADd/s320/IMG_1168.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">UNION MARKET</span> appears like a farmer's market with separate counters for cheese and cured meats, a butcher shop, bakery, grocers', fresh pasta stall, deli, sandwich and salad bar and cafe but the great thing is it's all in one place, and you pay like you would do at a supermarket. And behind each counter you'll find a man or woman who absolutely knows a pig's arse from its elbow. It really is the the cow's bollox - and what's more if you find they don't have any in the larder, they'll be happy to order some in for you. AND even give you a call at home to say 'Your cow's bollox have arrived Sir.' </div><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Quite like to just use this as a face mask</td></tr>
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeXl5ezMIubvdfDOL05lQVqSRH2BJ2NNFqwTpOmylEpZK5W7p5iu2ak6YQHhFYP2ohJgSN3hk-x0FLPNsbSt71lH6pNR8XnJoL5CeMicuTJDBH2D-J1fZTvqmcDF6LlpuKAUVR3jKsuQz8/s1600/IMG_1162.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeXl5ezMIubvdfDOL05lQVqSRH2BJ2NNFqwTpOmylEpZK5W7p5iu2ak6YQHhFYP2ohJgSN3hk-x0FLPNsbSt71lH6pNR8XnJoL5CeMicuTJDBH2D-J1fZTvqmcDF6LlpuKAUVR3jKsuQz8/s320/IMG_1162.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB39kP4-Ah0BuQBhDILCRDDCD9Sy1Djljq8eBvP6dGmiV3n1r7An3ZvxQ9pR9JY4p9SKuKYTFDq0ptRCIaLA2Y3dOh4r_TY6P_7p-3Vgt_vfSG1vwxDI3ie4krIQs0V_T2iKpsz6BIop44/s1600/UM++Cheese+Tower.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB39kP4-Ah0BuQBhDILCRDDCD9Sy1Djljq8eBvP6dGmiV3n1r7An3ZvxQ9pR9JY4p9SKuKYTFDq0ptRCIaLA2Y3dOh4r_TY6P_7p-3Vgt_vfSG1vwxDI3ie4krIQs0V_T2iKpsz6BIop44/s320/UM++Cheese+Tower.JPG" width="255" /></a></div><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuZ2njDEh_f3b0gHEthLnxbx9M6Y5jbnK3MyTBh16HuY0X1D5nIUv3D79OALxt24uNjLGLhW-zhNfUV5U9Z6ll15WZkKZ4fiSx6N4d-pKaCUDJd7V-FOV1zrcTk9phfXJ6n5jTKKlAvVfd/s1600/UM+Shop+Front.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuZ2njDEh_f3b0gHEthLnxbx9M6Y5jbnK3MyTBh16HuY0X1D5nIUv3D79OALxt24uNjLGLhW-zhNfUV5U9Z6ll15WZkKZ4fiSx6N4d-pKaCUDJd7V-FOV1zrcTk9phfXJ6n5jTKKlAvVfd/s320/UM+Shop+Front.JPG" width="320" /></a>To boot, it's right next to my pilates studio (i agree - of no use to you but I'm pleased which is the main thing), but more to the point it's in one of the most lovely London buidlings - the grade II listed old Fulham Broadway tube station - I'd never had known existed if they hadn't stripped it back to reveal the still perfectly painted iron ticket machines (now part of the cheese counter) and a sign that shouts 'TO THE TRAINS!' right above the wine wracks.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWyxqz-PYf5K9dxagpbXoRlDJua2uV4q7jfE80625-Ac_ymX_Gm-fBz1LZiqP1HBb5LQM_Q2sFH5g9xH2BjXAFEHvM9X4TnP-3Fs1pCwcxqi8ignJIEgE4ymJXL-GaAGz6X8Ynk174ny1u/s1600/IMG_1102.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWyxqz-PYf5K9dxagpbXoRlDJua2uV4q7jfE80625-Ac_ymX_Gm-fBz1LZiqP1HBb5LQM_Q2sFH5g9xH2BjXAFEHvM9X4TnP-3Fs1pCwcxqi8ignJIEgE4ymJXL-GaAGz6X8Ynk174ny1u/s320/IMG_1102.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">It's tempting to run off dramatically in that direction a few testers down. Never ceases to amuse (me... mainly).</div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>My week just deosn't feel complete until I've chatted to Zac who knows more about jamon than a spanish pig with black feet, or James the wine merchant who used to work at Fortnums and bigs up English wines with such gusto that even I'M worried a Frenchman's going to appear out of one of the schnapps barrels and 'thurmp 'im on th'nuse' for saying our champagne is better than 'is.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpCiq05SgIg8INNp7tSQscKgG0BXzvkXp7a9GPJigLCnwyTLNcLKiR3D2QXrzw1JY6EgVWaDGdXnhTJb3iU_Wuwm7_OiJ6ly9GdZtgPkLGsPgEMe1PR5KsUpBAXy3kfbNbSnVm4lqIFe_3/s1600/IMG_1107.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpCiq05SgIg8INNp7tSQscKgG0BXzvkXp7a9GPJigLCnwyTLNcLKiR3D2QXrzw1JY6EgVWaDGdXnhTJb3iU_Wuwm7_OiJ6ly9GdZtgPkLGsPgEMe1PR5KsUpBAXy3kfbNbSnVm4lqIFe_3/s320/IMG_1107.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">An old war food poster. There are lots on the walls.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwOh-KGJbYr2hG2VdC-KAZ9G1mJnQQLIElvuEgKwmojLK0wrja8JIff9sRXk8BoghfX2yFjSMXuz12O7PXnAo48T7f3zJ5H63S8YCWBRRdlRlfUwnILRcB0REJvj3urtokoP93PnABRqzO/s1600/IMG_1108.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwOh-KGJbYr2hG2VdC-KAZ9G1mJnQQLIElvuEgKwmojLK0wrja8JIff9sRXk8BoghfX2yFjSMXuz12O7PXnAo48T7f3zJ5H63S8YCWBRRdlRlfUwnILRcB0REJvj3urtokoP93PnABRqzO/s320/IMG_1108.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Another charmer</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmn2vy5wAR34Q2qxXHqdgh91KRNAwRmCfcnGZVt3w4HVinLM-0QBltSn_mark-PmxcElQS3rSI-_884j0geos4ZewiF8qRkaYCOPjC6Z2oCQtOknUt8PWD8i_E2rGBbilmUXUdvTHG2M6t/s1600/IMG_1171.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmn2vy5wAR34Q2qxXHqdgh91KRNAwRmCfcnGZVt3w4HVinLM-0QBltSn_mark-PmxcElQS3rSI-_884j0geos4ZewiF8qRkaYCOPjC6Z2oCQtOknUt8PWD8i_E2rGBbilmUXUdvTHG2M6t/s320/IMG_1171.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A six footer</td></tr>
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</div>It's full of humour, theatre and charm this place, and makes food shopping feel, rather than chore-ful - instead, somehow.... like it ought to.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX9tVQbV70nqLBkL4WIYWf4JbEQ7bwrXUdy3SZov1_9b2XRRJXReVK5xRhSanvevdK6MWjtUmcFvoG1LhEcNMAKwPh7eiAt24wfnBd-1XIq-s4XO1DNm_i-nsLJCOJ0zEnxJy6JiixfqAI/s1600/IMG_1164.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX9tVQbV70nqLBkL4WIYWf4JbEQ7bwrXUdy3SZov1_9b2XRRJXReVK5xRhSanvevdK6MWjtUmcFvoG1LhEcNMAKwPh7eiAt24wfnBd-1XIq-s4XO1DNm_i-nsLJCOJ0zEnxJy6JiixfqAI/s320/IMG_1164.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">They've even got a freakin' chicken selling you eggs. How authentic is that?</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimuG5SunDMV4AG7AHtnc1tE7zU0z3HJCstSSAd4ACgUR3inM4VhNX1Z_KOAL7ncO-s6HvABhoANqrigWl0rAu96k8daxKPCI41HAR3P9iSvsRFHjQKx1lVaa-ngYBpjaKHBlkqgH2cZcmg/s1600/IMG_1163.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimuG5SunDMV4AG7AHtnc1tE7zU0z3HJCstSSAd4ACgUR3inM4VhNX1Z_KOAL7ncO-s6HvABhoANqrigWl0rAu96k8daxKPCI41HAR3P9iSvsRFHjQKx1lVaa-ngYBpjaKHBlkqgH2cZcmg/s320/IMG_1163.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Purbeck - wherever you are, you have a new stalker</td></tr>
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-18471357304865169002011-05-26T03:34:00.000-07:002011-05-26T03:34:09.500-07:00Yastik? Bluddy fantastic!While 'fashion' carries on weeping from the loss of - no not McQueen silly - but Ozek leaving the industry, the world of interiors can start running through giant daisy covered fields of joy to have him entering their cosmos.<br />
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I know this is crude but there's simply no way to describe these other than...<br />
'orgasms in cushion form'.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSVkMq8nt7MOufj_zdHjIl6-2P0n_C6XV_x_1x9UbP9f1zBZqhg1ZhB3Dx0BhsD2e0a2vw5BsDswjsLcLG13sIOZi2du7Cp_fl9qWySBStO4guJNtuRSfiffxvIMAZYXXFp_8pVJTh6kZJ/s1600/images-1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSVkMq8nt7MOufj_zdHjIl6-2P0n_C6XV_x_1x9UbP9f1zBZqhg1ZhB3Dx0BhsD2e0a2vw5BsDswjsLcLG13sIOZi2du7Cp_fl9qWySBStO4guJNtuRSfiffxvIMAZYXXFp_8pVJTh6kZJ/s1600/images-1.jpeg" /></a></div>There, i said it. I know, I know, you're trying to swallow down the vomit I just induced but truly, all other words have escaped me. You can report abuse to blogspot or un-follow once you've been to the shop and decided i'm wrong. It's just off Kensington Church Street.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhOaiwN68vCxJrcB3U6MvFFDZVrfnj4ARAOjFx-4VOxG6yuPA6fZyjF4CSxy0vHqMNSkeNgKecWHpo6fK2ccyfLe_lJ7rQXViJOFhsrIKj5BsqnoaNQMypZm5U-I6NJSaYYicY_QGXctpS/s1600/245057-1yastik-shelving-o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhOaiwN68vCxJrcB3U6MvFFDZVrfnj4ARAOjFx-4VOxG6yuPA6fZyjF4CSxy0vHqMNSkeNgKecWHpo6fK2ccyfLe_lJ7rQXViJOFhsrIKj5BsqnoaNQMypZm5U-I6NJSaYYicY_QGXctpS/s320/245057-1yastik-shelving-o.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">SEE?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
I suppose when you find out that Rifat Ozbek is the seamstress behind them, their unadulterated loveliness is just not that surprising, but still the concept (and correct me if i'm wrong) - a cushion shop (how did no one think of that one before?) is completely original. Now, when can you say that nowadays - eh? Eh?<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0yYH3vzeU_5O5fS27CBfTWXEE2rvzBew15CWJ6fGt62o8v6Gq9DtXtfBI1Jh4uF_vEoJKzdehDvLd1ccBukBRDjeFNXZa0jiPdrUL8BCNx4hF3BR4mRUGKxG_L1PNZNhO0r28O_KZGdKs/s1600/245057-2yastik-red-pillows-10-o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0yYH3vzeU_5O5fS27CBfTWXEE2rvzBew15CWJ6fGt62o8v6Gq9DtXtfBI1Jh4uF_vEoJKzdehDvLd1ccBukBRDjeFNXZa0jiPdrUL8BCNx4hF3BR4mRUGKxG_L1PNZNhO0r28O_KZGdKs/s320/245057-2yastik-red-pillows-10-o.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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They make me think of India, Africa, Peru, (and considering the designer's roots, they would prob. make me think of Turkey had I been), the 60s, the 70s, my mother (I suppose the 'orgasm in cushion form' reference gains its inappropriateness <i>right</i> about now... ), my great grannny who wore leapard print raincoasts and drank Dubonet, beautiful old curtains we used to have at The Ferry House, my old nursery - everything I love really.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaQHHJASqk3vau1n0MOtbxBC87JIfjoSYou5_9HhzZfXMCj8bFwFoxtPTEFAaefUF3xjixNPaOpJjCTShhjDXHvg-zhz1UzJX7NxGfyGX3E2q_6fqs_vpOF4fohmVrbL1IRBtJlntvYIks/s1600/33144_952.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaQHHJASqk3vau1n0MOtbxBC87JIfjoSYou5_9HhzZfXMCj8bFwFoxtPTEFAaefUF3xjixNPaOpJjCTShhjDXHvg-zhz1UzJX7NxGfyGX3E2q_6fqs_vpOF4fohmVrbL1IRBtJlntvYIks/s320/33144_952.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><br />
I could genuinely sit and gaze longingly at them for hours, never really needing to move, eat or satisfy any other need, until my little hunched cross-legged figure is whittled down and finally turns into buttermilk,<br />
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just like the tigers from Little Black Sambo.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVLB01zUZyD6l7vtMFoSHueOoUQEBqUCFqdVTLhO4kiGYosU6YQr8zTMMIs7ataP8e56K_ZzF-laU6mBpYH_uja74q1C75SRe6bFD6yy5zY6JG8SC85GwnCA1S1I7t6GutBEIEayFTFIUP/s1600/sambo21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVLB01zUZyD6l7vtMFoSHueOoUQEBqUCFqdVTLhO4kiGYosU6YQr8zTMMIs7ataP8e56K_ZzF-laU6mBpYH_uja74q1C75SRe6bFD6yy5zY6JG8SC85GwnCA1S1I7t6GutBEIEayFTFIUP/s1600/sambo21.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjv2gcfr3noisDtCyRF31jAkIX-98bqnKZJ1B4RHlj1BycAciq5GKh1sVCuBOUSQM5SqXkxkSg7bvtsaHiW5lEa1plPqnCOuLvjo4YnpyfHdiUatAyf0PO8j2ejXtABMegpzxl3THDnFGSx/s1600/pic3.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjv2gcfr3noisDtCyRF31jAkIX-98bqnKZJ1B4RHlj1BycAciq5GKh1sVCuBOUSQM5SqXkxkSg7bvtsaHiW5lEa1plPqnCOuLvjo4YnpyfHdiUatAyf0PO8j2ejXtABMegpzxl3THDnFGSx/s1600/pic3.gif" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9b0HqyMWb5LTYVS_1GUImTnml7ZMv1-3XhX5Ws974AQflBFZXo61kdI1Y2Lzim5CKCVDj5thI4IbLBT_rZSr7g6Q9JvFA79SU3boBACgci2Iti9u660ol3WzpKOr8PXDVbHDo_QKMJXfL/s1600/59962714-the-tiger.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9b0HqyMWb5LTYVS_1GUImTnml7ZMv1-3XhX5Ws974AQflBFZXo61kdI1Y2Lzim5CKCVDj5thI4IbLBT_rZSr7g6Q9JvFA79SU3boBACgci2Iti9u660ol3WzpKOr8PXDVbHDo_QKMJXfL/s320/59962714-the-tiger.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Not sure Rifat wants buttermilk all over his shop floor though, so I'll stick to a standing ovation instead. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-88648534719857685932011-05-24T04:57:00.000-07:002011-05-24T05:02:12.939-07:00Keep It In Yer Trousers Please - I've Got A Plane To Catch<div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBPRauLOov118pwNGMJnsDvTg0FeqYWnXIFFNr5EEbWiEOsulskcIHeTmJNZW_3ITiaPsqngPbf4jBKJsXR6yhSLKdxdcbHAOi_CWF-OFm_AawLJDz6Osu3E_Xl0-pPShjTR82fAm91VeS/s1600/draft_lens4390592module30890952photo_1241277353mrtwit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBPRauLOov118pwNGMJnsDvTg0FeqYWnXIFFNr5EEbWiEOsulskcIHeTmJNZW_3ITiaPsqngPbf4jBKJsXR6yhSLKdxdcbHAOi_CWF-OFm_AawLJDz6Osu3E_Xl0-pPShjTR82fAm91VeS/s200/draft_lens4390592module30890952photo_1241277353mrtwit.jpg" width="120" /></a>I'm not really a bag person, more a bag lady, if a bag anything. I'm often seen wandering the streets wheeling one of those miniature suitcases, with various things hanging from my person in a uncomfortable fashion - notebooks, laptops, food, pieces of clothing I'm not wearing or I've forgotten to take to the menders. Things even hang from my my hair sometimes. (If you know me this makes sense.) I found my favourite biro I thought I'd lost on Sat. in my hair in fact. My dad retrieved it with much surprise. It wasn't much of a surprise to me though - my hair's been hijacking items for years (a bit like Roald Dahls' <i>Mr Twit's </i>cornflake-filled<i> </i>beards but cleaner and with less cornflakes). </div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
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</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">On a school trip once when I was 11, my hair shoplifted a whoopie cushion from a joke shop I used to frequent in Tetbury, unbeknownst to me. (The staple on the packaging had got caught.) I didn't notice until we were halfway down the motorway on our bus back to school. I felt terrible. My hair stubbonly refused to apologise and take it back so my friends and I (guiltily) made use of the stolen item, just so it didn't go to waste. (It felt awful just awful.)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUHA29jwUzLddrwb95DxsBZhpEVPFy_tHuh57YO92gtTQDNnN3_amAZ1Ii5RrVs34z0ibFuCrZBcVi6YIlcjh231difKKP_jZQ2GHSbmVb4VSxS7IfnmnGosQEqiNG1cPrmwRAvvc-Yd-P/s1600/baby_whoopee_cushion_costume__55751_std.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUHA29jwUzLddrwb95DxsBZhpEVPFy_tHuh57YO92gtTQDNnN3_amAZ1Ii5RrVs34z0ibFuCrZBcVi6YIlcjh231difKKP_jZQ2GHSbmVb4VSxS7IfnmnGosQEqiNG1cPrmwRAvvc-Yd-P/s1600/baby_whoopee_cushion_costume__55751_std.jpg" /></a></div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
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</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Anyway, back to bags... Here is the lovely 70s bag I use, which was passed down from my mum. Sadly it holds some unpleasant memories I'd like to erase by finding a new one. </div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
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</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">"But what are these unpleasant memories?" I hear you ask, hoping for a dose of schadenfreude to brighten your morning.</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Oh dear, really - do you want to hear? Well alright... The incident happened 3-years ago after I'd fallen asleep on someone's sofa in Ibiza. When I woke up I realised some cretin (who won't be named but he definitely has a name... that i know...) had peed (no not peered spelt wrong - actually peed) in my bag. And the worst thing was I became aware of it so quickly because the said cretin had informed his friend about the incident before passing out on the sofa next to me. I could've forgiven a drunken pee, in Ibiza, but i meeean!</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Looking back, I suppose that's what you get if you go to Ibiza, but either way, it struck me as a rather irrating choice of urinal at the time, ESPECIALLY as I had to go straight to the airport when I woke up AND I had to put my bag in a plastic bag to carry on the plane, which did not help my bag lady credentials any further. AND to pour add salt, lemon and a bit of tabasco into an already pee-sodden wound, I HAD no choice but to pick up my damp wrinkled passport by hand in order to show it to passport control. And yes he did ask, and yes i did lie.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Anyway, despite a sud-filled wash in the machine, giving it that oh-so-fashionable faded look (vintage has never looked so haunting), I've never really gotten over it and have been looking for one ever since. </div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
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</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">But I can't believe I've only just discovered ASOS bags. They're FAB! Because if like me your debit card frowns and tuts everytime you think you want a new one, these are definitely a solution - all under £100. </div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Effing nice - no?</div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV2JPu59IISX_BVM741qbeSSck6aKU84gwIuKJAryIMXjSVPUi1DRmbr5uQD-fIihdxKFxhVbLpl_Y1OMRvhT2AUgUjhh3VL3tQkQ6OruXsP5Ce0u-MUJHZE5id5HZpkDLB3Z0gAcO-nT7/s1600/image1l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV2JPu59IISX_BVM741qbeSSck6aKU84gwIuKJAryIMXjSVPUi1DRmbr5uQD-fIihdxKFxhVbLpl_Y1OMRvhT2AUgUjhh3VL3tQkQ6OruXsP5Ce0u-MUJHZE5id5HZpkDLB3Z0gAcO-nT7/s1600/image1l.jpg" /></a></div><div style="font-family: Helvetica; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrdYohF860F2N6ZqZotXednYP8lvX0KzN6tdj9THE33u2q5efdCdy7V07V_Nehjpwcx_mLiE6eY3uKPVT21CMFqL9V771lxSCRWv2qiqemZ2AtPzWN5u8lv4IMERAbNKOwI9wF3I-imYZo/s1600/image1xxl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrdYohF860F2N6ZqZotXednYP8lvX0KzN6tdj9THE33u2q5efdCdy7V07V_Nehjpwcx_mLiE6eY3uKPVT21CMFqL9V771lxSCRWv2qiqemZ2AtPzWN5u8lv4IMERAbNKOwI9wF3I-imYZo/s320/image1xxl.jpg" width="250" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Love this one's name - the 'Aztec Barrel Bag'</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHmfr-okemdbSLJc_x8IBK-VYGvRB23MCJw4c3ey-aoz_a3THMQwng4FtT5zaWwdW_RUWJR4B4banzYeGofx2NXr_Iv9YZOp0pOXl8HYEMLTrTs-S22SxqaoCK60tx7rQ6IYgH5DV8x6dD/s1600/image1xl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHmfr-okemdbSLJc_x8IBK-VYGvRB23MCJw4c3ey-aoz_a3THMQwng4FtT5zaWwdW_RUWJR4B4banzYeGofx2NXr_Iv9YZOp0pOXl8HYEMLTrTs-S22SxqaoCK60tx7rQ6IYgH5DV8x6dD/s320/image1xl.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="250" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This would obviously only fit a small hamster</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrLBbY7dnMEuHXIrTj5Z7OnP4kI9UwRowHoRzHLt2rFw8zVZ3aJpNoC85jqiHnPjeWMfab60dfDXaIZ3cFysUuA76hRtHN2b2dhccpIYKx6WrkYfjJKCe9EvEhU_5qWWVPMGqhjpXXV8nr/s1600/image1l-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrLBbY7dnMEuHXIrTj5Z7OnP4kI9UwRowHoRzHLt2rFw8zVZ3aJpNoC85jqiHnPjeWMfab60dfDXaIZ3cFysUuA76hRtHN2b2dhccpIYKx6WrkYfjJKCe9EvEhU_5qWWVPMGqhjpXXV8nr/s1600/image1l-2.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And here's a man bag thrown in for good measure. Although, I'm pretty sure this is my satchel from Peterborough High school...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-56564048443453495552011-05-18T10:10:00.000-07:002011-05-18T10:10:00.639-07:00Fallen in love with...<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Tanya Brett's 'Ice Souls' Exhibition</span></b><br />
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At first I thought 'Hmmm... animal sculptor - twee?' (book cover judging terribly) BUT the moment I clicked onto her website I gave this blasphemous thought a good spanking - twee couldn't be further from it - she IS TRULY BRILLIANT!<br />
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I can't look at her work without feeling emotional (and slightly cleptomaniacal). When I'm rich.... I'm going to kidnap her and employ her as my personal sculptor - a bit like King Leopold's son Archduke Rudolf did with Beethoven (without the kidnapping bit - he just paid to keep him in the country).<br />
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Her most recent exhibition, showing at the Jonathan Cooper Gallery, just off the Fulham Road is a trumph. I haven't loved an exhibition in its entirity like this for a long time.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1apOqWnJMCMlxttiqvWeegpCGJ_z94CaTvEFEqknhpJ0c89imZ53bPzeCOesm1RbVs9BeCeQHUch93cIkRUZ0pbcUHO7jA0xjQLOSw9DflQB_qhgPJCDky9x84yoavjeLEyQfnAXz3qq4/s1600/Sitting-Polar-Bear-II-and-B.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="236" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1apOqWnJMCMlxttiqvWeegpCGJ_z94CaTvEFEqknhpJ0c89imZ53bPzeCOesm1RbVs9BeCeQHUch93cIkRUZ0pbcUHO7jA0xjQLOSw9DflQB_qhgPJCDky9x84yoavjeLEyQfnAXz3qq4/s400/Sitting-Polar-Bear-II-and-B.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
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Called ICE SOULS and it consists of drawings and sculptures of arctic creatures - PENGUINS, WALRUSES, WOLVES, ARCTIC FOXES, HARES and POLAR BEARS. Her materials she uses - CLAY and PORCELAIN - lend beautifully to the icy theme. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiraQ5WgjRqU8P4xMFuCtMb8e8u9gM27RBejkGFv5VBQmcNj6M_ADaDjBAS1a_2OUwXfAwxsfLsty9yGRrVSBjx7bu-Nksp5K6vs9yw21N6kSf1jfQKKP0SrPPj3AYCnLzjrcq2INHBcn-F/s1600/Swimming+Bear+by+Tanya+Brett+54+x+67+x+19+cm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiraQ5WgjRqU8P4xMFuCtMb8e8u9gM27RBejkGFv5VBQmcNj6M_ADaDjBAS1a_2OUwXfAwxsfLsty9yGRrVSBjx7bu-Nksp5K6vs9yw21N6kSf1jfQKKP0SrPPj3AYCnLzjrcq2INHBcn-F/s320/Swimming+Bear+by+Tanya+Brett+54+x+67+x+19+cm.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Sadly, as is often the case with art - this photograph in no way does it justice. In its proper 3-D form, this beautiful bear is paddling in a circular motion through what must be imaginary water by the way its fur seems to trail in one direction, (like my hair does when I go swimming - usually round in circles - i'm not very good at it).<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8HyroQD3UT-wG4xXC3Q31CyMxy2EwVcqeMSj8UnT87ixEdBdyurWUdNdEHZ69nUxmgRx2aKaAd_o5LFCsDm3-MTBgdyUAiQMPs0dII12xnPkU1kUbtD4ZRAQvGMd3KtPtYGJ2XdCSaC9r/s1600/Sitting-Polar-Bear-II-and-B.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="291" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8HyroQD3UT-wG4xXC3Q31CyMxy2EwVcqeMSj8UnT87ixEdBdyurWUdNdEHZ69nUxmgRx2aKaAd_o5LFCsDm3-MTBgdyUAiQMPs0dII12xnPkU1kUbtD4ZRAQvGMd3KtPtYGJ2XdCSaC9r/s320/Sitting-Polar-Bear-II-and-B.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Tanya said: "I became obsessed with this film of a swimming bear on 'Planet Earth'. I thought how beautiful it was, and I was thinking how I could sculpt it as my materials are quite heavy. What also struck me was how big this creature was, yet it had such lightness in the water, which made it look so vulnerable.'<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVPenQ0TMltEV6BsgKZika5SoXgqndAJwqryqhnJyZUjirZmikv7ZGa16OU_w-4f74UCHJx5-FGD75ybCKdd_ADS_ajU1fz4sVr96exkhH_xfvmneW5hxpA9UDEYDk3y7KX_zxGB7rKLil/s1600/Sitting+Bear+I+by+Tanya+Brett+57+x+78+x+28+cm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="262" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVPenQ0TMltEV6BsgKZika5SoXgqndAJwqryqhnJyZUjirZmikv7ZGa16OU_w-4f74UCHJx5-FGD75ybCKdd_ADS_ajU1fz4sVr96exkhH_xfvmneW5hxpA9UDEYDk3y7KX_zxGB7rKLil/s320/Sitting+Bear+I+by+Tanya+Brett+57+x+78+x+28+cm.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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And before I dragged myself - fingernails at the doorframe - away from her exhibtion, Tanya told me: "This is the first exhibtion I feel really proud of,' which was so nice to hear as artists are too often critical to the last about their work - especially on the day of their launch.<br />
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Lastly, I remembered that polar bears are on the endangered list - something the artist hadn't forgotten either, as a percentage of her exhibtion went to the Hauser Bears charity.<br />
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A saint and a genius all round (VOm!).Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-88595987261780627432011-05-15T07:27:00.000-07:002011-05-15T07:27:11.623-07:00My Week of BeastsTo avoid appearing too like The Daily Mail, I'll keep any comments brief. They'll be no stories about cats saving diabetics lives by calling 999 OR pictures of seals making cute human faces. No monkeys in aprons either. One must put a foot down at somewhere...<br />
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Lovely little chick<br />
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<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTmfob5gf8EWBh2tCMGwwpHP2O_sjAj7zYSCdOmOmix3WBwdtVssZHEp2cPF3dFtfWEJm-E7swzgFsHKHQ_-zq_HV8ZFPieMvS_BL1mdvMGakods3QIFh8OoDa3dzLA2UrInPvF2bFONT4/s1600/Peterborough-20110509-00170.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 298px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTmfob5gf8EWBh2tCMGwwpHP2O_sjAj7zYSCdOmOmix3WBwdtVssZHEp2cPF3dFtfWEJm-E7swzgFsHKHQ_-zq_HV8ZFPieMvS_BL1mdvMGakods3QIFh8OoDa3dzLA2UrInPvF2bFONT4/s400/Peterborough-20110509-00170.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5605053815218327186"></a><br />
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Chick-off?<br />
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<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8M_cjutKcg8DYnmSwMkpU-T0e_wdrTLA18XVkoZs46Fs5I_UCv0zHAyy5q2L86gFWGCSS6LXKfalIF4e96-EQrZGJHDB18inl29FMBDfZ31Nvx0cbsPjuQQ5nLZCX_HcUX8U8VXr2Ykbe/s1600/Peterborough-20110509-00172.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8M_cjutKcg8DYnmSwMkpU-T0e_wdrTLA18XVkoZs46Fs5I_UCv0zHAyy5q2L86gFWGCSS6LXKfalIF4e96-EQrZGJHDB18inl29FMBDfZ31Nvx0cbsPjuQQ5nLZCX_HcUX8U8VXr2Ykbe/s400/Peterborough-20110509-00172.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5605054836982051042"></a><br />
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Charlie wins for me. Better chick to face hew. Mine's a bit too sallow. Should've gone for a brown chick really. Also my nose is too big but that's not really the chick's fault... (Although his chick looks like it's about to attempt suicide so perhaps I can steal back a point there.)<br />
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Lovely puppy on the beach. <br />
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<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeX__PjC_qHs7wfdEofmAb7BHxMx27z2gD3u-ac7ZLNKlU_weXXUlEUWdxCFmRF0WYxCStS5zG3EgBeIGkaImdWhuQLUIBBUXKOVdA27voN8pvU5dRKujcZkUZerGp8C8TTqkn7eXoQusS/s1600/MIlton+in+MAy+065.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeX__PjC_qHs7wfdEofmAb7BHxMx27z2gD3u-ac7ZLNKlU_weXXUlEUWdxCFmRF0WYxCStS5zG3EgBeIGkaImdWhuQLUIBBUXKOVdA27voN8pvU5dRKujcZkUZerGp8C8TTqkn7eXoQusS/s400/MIlton+in+MAy+065.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606495879518555378"></a><br />
Sorry - pics getting a bit vommy now.<br />
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Lully donkies and a girl with a teatowel (See i promised no aprons, teatowels only.)<br />
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg18g7qQxqHbHWKUwUAXegzP26qEksXhpVRvhQpVC82zU8e28Llt6ilI2xDzQ7bBM64I3JYmhf_zZfF4SqNFSP7ytt4ucISUA_DWte46UeGd5isXWvqEoRinNZIred0YCEUwebd_M_3KL6r/s1600/MIlton+in+MAy+072.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg18g7qQxqHbHWKUwUAXegzP26qEksXhpVRvhQpVC82zU8e28Llt6ilI2xDzQ7bBM64I3JYmhf_zZfF4SqNFSP7ytt4ucISUA_DWte46UeGd5isXWvqEoRinNZIred0YCEUwebd_M_3KL6r/s400/MIlton+in+MAy+072.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606491881516400530"></a><br />
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Paddy deathstaring a donkey. That got a bit freaky after a while. The donkey had a crazed look on his face and sterted pawing (can they paw or do they hoof/huf?) at the ground. It was a bit like they were psyching each other at the beginning of the gauntlet in Gladiators. I had to take Paddy away before things turned really nasty.<br />
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<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU8yrsUuSSVETN1meyPRbV3RVueK4sPKbJGrsnvTZEv7C6Lg2c9aL4wDQ2qVzmtHkGaVq9v9G96EbmHZjc-pMo0BNhlyYJVckecfSBDk78jexGp-MtiwbYLsCzTQFzKle0gF3CMVuJcqTP/s1600/MIlton+in+MAy+077.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU8yrsUuSSVETN1meyPRbV3RVueK4sPKbJGrsnvTZEv7C6Lg2c9aL4wDQ2qVzmtHkGaVq9v9G96EbmHZjc-pMo0BNhlyYJVckecfSBDk78jexGp-MtiwbYLsCzTQFzKle0gF3CMVuJcqTP/s400/MIlton+in+MAy+077.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606488722129743106"></a><br />
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Me being chase by some cows... <br />
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu5NSbZM-k13sdBUVHfapTGXcF9hilCrpCk04N89E9g7hDGJtYmc_91z-Wp4PMS5dUBB2oAx-zUmRkqYsvzd4kBjaIyIEXtU0WbM253B2Q1o-VXV4GxovQ9cKmzPRMxDcYajVD62mQaRWW/s1600/MIlton+in+MAy+054.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu5NSbZM-k13sdBUVHfapTGXcF9hilCrpCk04N89E9g7hDGJtYmc_91z-Wp4PMS5dUBB2oAx-zUmRkqYsvzd4kBjaIyIEXtU0WbM253B2Q1o-VXV4GxovQ9cKmzPRMxDcYajVD62mQaRWW/s400/MIlton+in+MAy+054.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606490931125685058"></a>Now I look at this, I must admit they look very dorment but I PROMISE you they had been chasing me, galloping in fact, with some speed. Trick of the light I suppose... <br />
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And the pièce de résistance of 'my week in beasts' - Introducing Paddy (dog) and Will (brother) entering the dog agility course at the Milton show - a very serious and impressive event, where highly trained dogs jump obediantly through hoops, across narrow beams and up and down seesaws. Timing is crucial. Enter Will and Paddy:<br />
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It gets better i promise...<br />
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<iframe width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/hkzdFkv5pYw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-68637907957200567432011-05-10T02:24:00.001-07:002011-05-10T03:25:27.589-07:00Loaded? Have a garden? Like zero-gravity? Thought so. These are for you...<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3mqhtmzr-Qy6UoLv0t_IkFwCGHrp5P61zUnva13s-FepuOiLjpjG2-6wuUpTK_LjwUBhQiKRnd1hCpjPafFMzkMw7NgfL1BhBQ9orX8W9xxtNe_F-OheFXQ880zWEpgDks3ez78mUzvs/s1600/lafuma_rsxa_folding_recliner_relaxers_with_wooden_arms_tn.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 210px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3mqhtmzr-Qy6UoLv0t_IkFwCGHrp5P61zUnva13s-FepuOiLjpjG2-6wuUpTK_LjwUBhQiKRnd1hCpjPafFMzkMw7NgfL1BhBQ9orX8W9xxtNe_F-OheFXQ880zWEpgDks3ez78mUzvs/s400/lafuma_rsxa_folding_recliner_relaxers_with_wooden_arms_tn.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5605018734506529138" /></a>When I'm rich and have a garden, these are the first things I'm going to buy for it. They might not look much but in reality they're incredibly stylish - think Mad Men al fresco - and brilliantly designed. If you're sitting up straight, you've got the foot bar to rest your feet on, the moveable head cushion to keep your loaf in check and the very comfortable and rather stylish curved wooden and coated steel arm rests. BUT (and this is the clever bit) as soon as you decide to take a trip to rancho relaxo, the chair reclines with you, as long as your feet are on the bar and your hands on the arm rests. It happens with such ease you'll feel like you're in space... in the 50s. They're by Lafuma, you can find them online and they seem to range from £110-£215.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNhE7eexWRi2i9rMOQCiUaf4eyYEQkLyAb2lMsmFYctJH_oZ6ajJZ5T0lyilP_pnVmnevBKgt6oXTjcULg4ysHpwA64-rORVAtPlxl2UtPKvyqO7vR1h0DnfD9v3QNjdXCZzKQ_lGUgwkY/s1600/IMG_0907.JPG"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNhE7eexWRi2i9rMOQCiUaf4eyYEQkLyAb2lMsmFYctJH_oZ6ajJZ5T0lyilP_pnVmnevBKgt6oXTjcULg4ysHpwA64-rORVAtPlxl2UtPKvyqO7vR1h0DnfD9v3QNjdXCZzKQ_lGUgwkY/s320/IMG_0907.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5605025413898601394" /></a> 'Siegle' I think is the nicest colour - means 'oatmeal' in French. Gives it that 50s look, but forest and tweed are nice too. Check out the boyfriend doing a demo (not sure he knew he was doing a demo at the time - especially with all that zero-gravity technology going on). Not sure he's really doing it justice either with the peturbed look of concentration going on there but perhaps that shows how easy it is to be in your own little world, without the worrying thoughts of 'am i sitting up straight?' or 'am i at a 45degree angle?' rudely intruding. <br /><br />He's probably looking at my blog.Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-10424389818004401342011-04-30T03:05:00.000-07:002011-05-03T03:35:48.532-07:00RED HAIR, 16 GOLF BALLS AND 52 OYSTERS...might sound like key ingredients to a witches cauldron but were in fact the main ingredients of my Easter weekend in Donegal, Ireland. There were quite a few curious things about where I went, curious enough to blog about that is. <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEeSlu_ZnYPUDJF_vGRsei6DKPOVRMRQpr_Ck9eBmY4hEUjoHqGUD1a0G2fw-ojCjMy5Cc1d9SYF8QxXesV1daf3DT8ZWXdSb9KP4-HrEt5sT1eYWIhNyL_WQE9NAbudQCxUOQphs3Uf5a/s1600/sardines.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 154px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEeSlu_ZnYPUDJF_vGRsei6DKPOVRMRQpr_Ck9eBmY4hEUjoHqGUD1a0G2fw-ojCjMy5Cc1d9SYF8QxXesV1daf3DT8ZWXdSb9KP4-HrEt5sT1eYWIhNyL_WQE9NAbudQCxUOQphs3Uf5a/s400/sardines.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5601322995364575538" /></a>FIrstly, the house we stayed in belonged to not one, not two but three aunts who live there with not one, not two but three of their husbands AND not one, not two but ALL 10 of their children!! "Wow!" i thought, mimicking the immortal words of the Duchess of Cambridge on the balcony of Buckingham Palace a weekend later, with 'I wonder where I'm going to be sleeping' as an after thought. <br /><br />Secondly, the aunt's family with the most children (which was 4) had produced not one (okay this is getting tiresome now, I'll stop) but THREE redheads. The parents are both blond. 'Curious', I thought. It took me right back to my A-level biology classes - the ones about dominant and recessive genes - the conclusion being ...I obviously wasn't listening.<br /><br />Thirdly, I was taken down to the shores of Loch Swilly (Whose willy? Nope? No one found that funny at Easter either) and shown the delightful cottage where my boyfriend was born. It was called The Ferry House. 'Even MORE curious', went my thoughts, for I too was born in the Ferry House, not this one, but another in Cambrdigeshire. Could the uncanniness just stop already???!!<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh15ecsK4hk1AxOOUaepe8L_KesMUfUHgjM6W5JJ0imUdAlTHKpsYRdFWF20YsmiLBncYHqRozbe7e4sklj-PkJwDcoGulPLmTUKTS0PJT_Gbs6mI5fCSsx00eoxRtWZ8ua-wtaHh0UBD8/s1600/IMG_0906.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh15ecsK4hk1AxOOUaepe8L_KesMUfUHgjM6W5JJ0imUdAlTHKpsYRdFWF20YsmiLBncYHqRozbe7e4sklj-PkJwDcoGulPLmTUKTS0PJT_Gbs6mI5fCSsx00eoxRtWZ8ua-wtaHh0UBD8/s400/IMG_0906.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5601343627703626386" /></a>Fourthly (if such a rank exists), I found an oyster on the beach took it back to the house, opened it, broke the knife, to my delight found it was alive, added a squeeze of lemon, a shake of Tabasco and plopped it into my mouth. It really was the most delicious thing that had happened to my tongue in years. Not wanting to be the only one experiencing such pleasures in my hostsssss' house, I went down to the beach with my Ferry House twin and a Sainsbury's bag and like two truffle pigs we managed to scout 52 of them, 26 each EXACTLY. (Coincidences had become rather passe by this point, but admittedly this was erring on the uncanny side.) <br /><br />After the team (we had become a team by this point, with team leaders and everything it was just easier) had scoffed the lot, we went to bed that night, in oyster bliss....<br /><br />Next morning, on another walk along the beach, I was told by a local, wandering Swilly's shores (I feel a Cornish du Maurier's 'Rebecca' boatman accent works the imagination best here): "You know ther wer a sewage leak not so long agow?" I didn't actually. CUE PSYCHO MUSIC, A BIT OF THE JAWS SOUNDTRACK THEN MY DAY-MARE of having wiped out an entire family of two generations over one weekend. <br /><br />The visual equivalent of my daymare. Them - all gone!! Because of me...<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZEqQtcDMLHFw-7GeYPHRznzn2F_ulUHS0hR82kOAnOv-cYQH54TDK_JzREQt4NhGnubH-Sf7Bwl_PMYx_aX4Wj9hGo_cTVBzgpXpWm5Kab5fTHd8RjEthiq_fDE9hPMQRvJNwGOn4Amhh/s1600/Michael_Kramer_Family.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 288px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZEqQtcDMLHFw-7GeYPHRznzn2F_ulUHS0hR82kOAnOv-cYQH54TDK_JzREQt4NhGnubH-Sf7Bwl_PMYx_aX4Wj9hGo_cTVBzgpXpWm5Kab5fTHd8RjEthiq_fDE9hPMQRvJNwGOn4Amhh/s400/Michael_Kramer_Family.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5602428185275532210" /></a>Oh dear... some repayment for being asked for such a wonderful weekend.<br /><br /><br />After a sleepless night of listening outside doors to confirm the correct number of snores per room, I woke to find them all still alive (curiously - no. 5 I think we can call that).<br /><br />They are still alive now. I have checked (regularly). And no one has turned flourescant or grown crab pincers... yet. <br /><br />PHEW!<br /><br />The Human Crab hmmm.... you missed a trick there Hitchcock.Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-566126670864061982011-04-19T05:58:00.000-07:002011-04-19T07:36:59.122-07:00INSPIRATION FOR THE HOARDERFor someone who has a lot of stuff and very little place to keep it. <br />Some inspiring bookcases...<br /><br />ENJOY! <br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpW9zbQqShtQl9TxFhqE759qjsBp0-EOBJHdGS-7I1mO7A6X-dX3fDN8IwBwVoBiwuqENyyH_KA-NqxlWlXCqmPs9l7aVTRBFhj00Lsy4185ofh9ctx8ScYk2k8wyslIyYknflKURkbd-t/s1600/Staircase+awkward+space.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 338px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpW9zbQqShtQl9TxFhqE759qjsBp0-EOBJHdGS-7I1mO7A6X-dX3fDN8IwBwVoBiwuqENyyH_KA-NqxlWlXCqmPs9l7aVTRBFhj00Lsy4185ofh9ctx8ScYk2k8wyslIyYknflKURkbd-t/s400/Staircase+awkward+space.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597290786517961074" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Found this in House and Garden. A lovely use of an awkward space. It's almost cave-like, which is probably why I like it.<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-0X27DluzBh8rdHAx3UTJQPyo2fiLEZEWOuHcKJC7SZidGjQz_cXT0sOo6o-xpyaoAaVjej-gyS8ZR8IGjslXj5yDg3hKCE4PJoBjmlFO8Ur3_oIvvtg5AsaFhluabWlt-d3pVA6qORDI/s1600/IMG_0873.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-0X27DluzBh8rdHAx3UTJQPyo2fiLEZEWOuHcKJC7SZidGjQz_cXT0sOo6o-xpyaoAaVjej-gyS8ZR8IGjslXj5yDg3hKCE4PJoBjmlFO8Ur3_oIvvtg5AsaFhluabWlt-d3pVA6qORDI/s400/IMG_0873.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597293173587013362" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />This is my bookworm. Looks a bit like a book-tornado when you're drunk but I think it's such a fab way of displaying all your collectables. It's also a great idea for softening up a square space, being the round peg in a square hole kinda girl that i am. It comes in black and red too I seem to remember - matt or shiny! <br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2b9tW7Mo_CLzGksagCzY9xXZ6wYNekfbIx7DD8QJb9EjkWiwliOxyoiLfv73aw8dZqIp9-T3_NFlu7T0FkCGTdjLRigCtTtkUGGBkcrdMDrUGytYhR1oEkWh6BRWQzAqABBQ6svbHlzvC/s1600/Geometric+snake.jpeg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 388px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2b9tW7Mo_CLzGksagCzY9xXZ6wYNekfbIx7DD8QJb9EjkWiwliOxyoiLfv73aw8dZqIp9-T3_NFlu7T0FkCGTdjLRigCtTtkUGGBkcrdMDrUGytYhR1oEkWh6BRWQzAqABBQ6svbHlzvC/s400/Geometric+snake.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597295427353932706" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Another House and Garden number. This is what you go for if you're the neat and tidy version of me, or someone who likes straight lines. It's a bit like a Nokia snake. Wow - haven't played that in a while. It's almost retro.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrwVtov52XMB_FpLrqTwiKKq3CODpGVbut1GvkzvBuDMsKBh1LzBiEePWUqOQKBkgg_Lg5US46rE9mAk0mLokDlOaXNLUPGPScgqkjkjMf1f41SPi2OtbzVdbM8suYVGquCAUQ4e0O3LQ8/s1600/stair-case-kuo.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrwVtov52XMB_FpLrqTwiKKq3CODpGVbut1GvkzvBuDMsKBh1LzBiEePWUqOQKBkgg_Lg5US46rE9mAk0mLokDlOaXNLUPGPScgqkjkjMf1f41SPi2OtbzVdbM8suYVGquCAUQ4e0O3LQ8/s400/stair-case-kuo.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597291712663755042" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />The 'staircase' designed by Danny Kuo makes sense of the one above, which only works if you're a giant or happy to include step-ladder chic into your interior decor. I'm just not. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVcBylk_JQkAkFTA4mT0gutOlx3zhLJNvO4_EH2UYGmuXzoWnhKi2WvROHi_A0ok3xtG3JHMlbt6SZCd0NfBUXWDjSf7mnwx4_7muNQWaHfS3hWPEUO0i5kgsXDjXE6JOCSaY-BGD-I8XQ/s1600/Bookstairs.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 333px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVcBylk_JQkAkFTA4mT0gutOlx3zhLJNvO4_EH2UYGmuXzoWnhKi2WvROHi_A0ok3xtG3JHMlbt6SZCd0NfBUXWDjSf7mnwx4_7muNQWaHfS3hWPEUO0i5kgsXDjXE6JOCSaY-BGD-I8XQ/s400/Bookstairs.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597297061336603650" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Gotta be my favourite...Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-35062989992614731472011-04-14T03:23:00.000-07:002011-04-19T05:34:16.331-07:00JUST.... ONE.... MORE.... PUSH.. that's..... it...<br /><br /><br /><br />....BAAAAAAAAAAAA!!<br /><br />Not yer average birth I'll give you that, unless of course you either grew up in North Wales, or had work experience with the Easter bunny. For me - it was the former.<br /><br />A couple of nights ago, I saw a documentary about lambing being advertised and aside from nearly falling off my (incredibly uncomfortable IKEA) sofa with surprise, it brought flooding back some of my fondest memories. <br /><br />Aged 10; life started - I discovered lambing. I also discovered being paid, but £1 an hour seemed too sweet a pill to swallow for me, doing 8 hours of work a day in what seemed like my own personalised HEAVEN. None-the-less, dad insisted.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpML9S6aufUdywq2pcR0RxKReh2P1LPMdWmjr8ZjmEPi4zSFhmej2PA0QQPv7lc1XpxeVLOzMmfZ5Ct5vjS8mpFxeyE4iOCHuJAB069PkQXFCSBI1S65I5zXUMHyNdpt7WlAU6jruETKrH/s1600/dhbtsb8r_708j63z55gm.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 265px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpML9S6aufUdywq2pcR0RxKReh2P1LPMdWmjr8ZjmEPi4zSFhmej2PA0QQPv7lc1XpxeVLOzMmfZ5Ct5vjS8mpFxeyE4iOCHuJAB069PkQXFCSBI1S65I5zXUMHyNdpt7WlAU6jruETKrH/s400/dhbtsb8r_708j63z55gm.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5595437512945470834" /></a><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">This is not me - just an appropriate image. I was a girl.</span><br /><br />NOT FOR THE FAINT AT HEART<br />I had a never been a squeamish child, nor am I a squeamish grown-up. Worms, snakes, beetles, ants, snails and puppy dog tails, animals - dead or alive - yup that was me. My elder brother was left to play with the sugar and spice. WHICH having rather got off the scent of this tale is where I get to the point that 'lambing really was riiiiiiight up my street!' Animals - check. Dirt, straw, mud, blood, guts - check. AND the grrrrand finale (cue drumroll) a baby, yes a BABY (another childhood obsession) sheep covered in ALL of the above. WHAT WASN"T to LIKE (as they say)?<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiilKKE3cL0HXtKRQwjBUJJNy63e2p62lsRy6YLkTkn4BmZ6nDtS_p00uS7sQqBweCTrxqTsz0ZHDuVQihnHCitXOfSzAKMPfz_ZzPv02s4sUg9Y90Prdqm13QmZCf9X8HK20W36ApONH1H/s1600/heaven-gate.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 370px; height: 282px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiilKKE3cL0HXtKRQwjBUJJNy63e2p62lsRy6YLkTkn4BmZ6nDtS_p00uS7sQqBweCTrxqTsz0ZHDuVQihnHCitXOfSzAKMPfz_ZzPv02s4sUg9Y90Prdqm13QmZCf9X8HK20W36ApONH1H/s400/heaven-gate.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5595440722592019410" /></a><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">There he is - the lamby god of heaven. I can hear them now, bleating to me from behind the pearly gates.</span><br /><br />WELL I NEVER!<br />But what I wasn't prepared for was the intricate and clever nature of an animal always thought to be one of nature's stoopidist. Well they just aren't. My first glimpse into the mind of this Einstein-like creature was after a particularly troublesome birth due to a very fat lamb whose head had gone back. After this realisation and much straining (from the sheep) the farmer instructed me 'Gloves on - You're going in!' You see my little hands were of more use to him in this situation than his were. And I'm thinking the sheep probably wouldn't have objected either had she the choice, poor thing. I can explain further if you like... NO NO fair enough, you get it.<br /><br />So my job was to push the sheep back up into the thicker part of the womb and try and pull its head round carefully by going behind it without breaking the neck so the lamb was in more of a diving position. No pressure! Do you follow?<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz7Lp7T5T37gClSSPk93Xuji3I3-p5lnjVtNVucwhZnTi1PBBykHP2QFGhSR83QqomYVAvHOkqdObDvAh82oJZPt_Ce4kaKWpHq6b7OdrxHg7qbBZ2eO_aFIbH_ck7KIT7x0ejNIWDDwgH/s1600/The-correct-position-to-assume-when-diving-into-shallow-wate.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 316px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz7Lp7T5T37gClSSPk93Xuji3I3-p5lnjVtNVucwhZnTi1PBBykHP2QFGhSR83QqomYVAvHOkqdObDvAh82oJZPt_Ce4kaKWpHq6b7OdrxHg7qbBZ2eO_aFIbH_ck7KIT7x0ejNIWDDwgH/s400/The-correct-position-to-assume-when-diving-into-shallow-wate.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5595444935935453666" /></a><br /><br />After a bit of a struggle (and some other issues I'll refrain from sharing with you to avoid vomit on the keyboard) I managed to get the head round and with a long tug, out it came! It lay pretty still for a few nervy seconds before giving a little sneeze and embracing its first day of life as a soggy lamb. <br /><br />And just when I thought the action was over.... the farmer announced we were going to adopt! <br />Within seconds, using her guerilla tactics, the farmer's wife (who'd been hiding behind the pen) had placed the 2 day old orphan next to his would-be brother. 'Really', I said 'Was the stealth mission necessary? Couldn't you've have just put the orphan in the pen and let the sheep get on with it. Surely, she'd never know the difference?'<br />'Absoutely not!' came the farmer's reply. 'In fact we must do everything we can to convince the sheep she's had twins.' After saying this, he took the orphan lamb who was just going 'Blaaaaaaa' at this point and promptly silenced it by pushing its head up the sheep's !!AHEM!! before slowly pulling it out again, and then rubbing the orphan over the shivering wet newborn. <br /><br />Surely this was beyond the realms of orphan duty?<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiUoJnqWFH9TqBe-7AprzXeImwLN90UiD_gi5TYWyKPfKC4CBh4Lw_D1MvCUBTREFdbpTPKsCEhh2bwp_pfp3JAWuKa6JqL1wlch5BkWGs6LTu5uS_KVskrb7-iVgA4K9LtgxsSzRZ0_uj/s1600/fuck-no-mum-not-agen.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 180px; height: 360px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiUoJnqWFH9TqBe-7AprzXeImwLN90UiD_gi5TYWyKPfKC4CBh4Lw_D1MvCUBTREFdbpTPKsCEhh2bwp_pfp3JAWuKa6JqL1wlch5BkWGs6LTu5uS_KVskrb7-iVgA4K9LtgxsSzRZ0_uj/s400/fuck-no-mum-not-agen.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597247337301658162" /></a><br /><br />"Was THAT necessary?" came the next bout of insatiable curiosity.<br /><br />What I had just witnessed was an adoption technique where the farmer was trying to simulate another birth so the sheep wouldn't suspect foul play; and rubbing the orphan over the newborn was to help it appear and smell the same. "They're much cleverer than they look. You can't take any chances,' said the farmer as he placed first the orphan lamb in front of the mother to lick, leaving the newborn behind her. The mother was immediately tentative but after a while got into the spirit of cleaning her "newborn" (te-he we know better) lamb. AFter a good 5 minutes of bonding, the rightful lamb was put at her head also. Again, this was no random act and all part of the adoption: getting the mother used to the smell of the adopted lamb before her own lamb was introduced, so she was less likely to smell an intrudor.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2gn52H3i6F61a3i3cR4N8xlbpfVzqEMLDhmUKgNUUA1UfBTn0QeLWqVU4pBxGkvjriTS0sjLee7BoBrGnvDfIz_i8s2IacLlwAXTH2rCpgPllu_g_1UUjBGAJbG4hFYSFV83C2ohKftN8/s1600/424194-ewe-and-her-new-born-lamb.jpeg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2gn52H3i6F61a3i3cR4N8xlbpfVzqEMLDhmUKgNUUA1UfBTn0QeLWqVU4pBxGkvjriTS0sjLee7BoBrGnvDfIz_i8s2IacLlwAXTH2rCpgPllu_g_1UUjBGAJbG4hFYSFV83C2ohKftN8/s400/424194-ewe-and-her-new-born-lamb.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5596985934683857666" /></a><br /><br />EXTRAORDINARY i thought.... and still do. <br /><br />But the most surprising thing was, it didn't always work. Sometimes the sheep was way too nifty and knew exactly what was going on, so, the poor thing would be returned to the orphanage in the hope of having better luck next time. <br />The consequences of not removing an unwanted lamb very often meant its death, either by being crushed or suffocated by the mother. (I never knew sheep could be so vicious!) This was a very sad sight to find, and probably rather costly, so for all its gruesomeness (which admittedly i rather liked aged 10) I now understood why it was so important to the farmer for it to work.<br /><br /><br />NEXT TIME ON Vi PEEP'S LAMBING WEEKLY... 'More scintillating adoption techniques'<br /><br /> (My middle name isn't MARY for nothing!)Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-22284729188706674352011-04-11T08:57:00.000-07:002011-04-11T09:39:13.520-07:00Who Needs a Wedding Invite......when you can stay at home and knit your own royal wedding!<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiaaaHeHXhazT41yIAvrDJHAtm_jhgAo5nL-UJDOhB3xYqpMSErbx6hTahZ83KpTmr4qvF5HqL9rxFq6o7fmm6l2m7XdCqgBH-JKsPQP8qIzZ9feZg2YF_w4pzm8DSlTrFHBb7ihh80xnkO/s1600/knit-your-own-royal-wedding1.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiaaaHeHXhazT41yIAvrDJHAtm_jhgAo5nL-UJDOhB3xYqpMSErbx6hTahZ83KpTmr4qvF5HqL9rxFq6o7fmm6l2m7XdCqgBH-JKsPQP8qIzZ9feZg2YF_w4pzm8DSlTrFHBb7ihh80xnkO/s400/knit-your-own-royal-wedding1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594359586293515682" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />Look at the lovely 'Catherine' - positively blushing - all knitted. <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9HrFP8UNw2hmZM2pV_XAXS0SFytCQOX60vYzt0jdQDPqPM6WaMQxrWmvulHPKGXivcMPjKbpK5VX8I-yDDcaRnf7DJz-qYQGAt0R7PSJFFiI_PIAm2JO64YiVKCFDLeMWsCKlxzvZ0Nbi/s1600/KateMiddletonknitted.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 196px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9HrFP8UNw2hmZM2pV_XAXS0SFytCQOX60vYzt0jdQDPqPM6WaMQxrWmvulHPKGXivcMPjKbpK5VX8I-yDDcaRnf7DJz-qYQGAt0R7PSJFFiI_PIAm2JO64YiVKCFDLeMWsCKlxzvZ0Nbi/s400/KateMiddletonknitted.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594360415861977154" /></a><br /><br /><br />And one musn't forget the corgies. <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4RcoVLeIjcZBkVI_aqhMMFEJWiYfQBuPUpi9s4IWzpHsbRNYsvBQvU-pS3hjj3Gb2esElr3_w0Hs4X1MWBzrOoyyHGvkp8lgMY3XNq32mJuUKnIj3m_XeBHNs1rbH6AMXvcY5AcqWLpCv/s1600/images.jpeg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 225px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4RcoVLeIjcZBkVI_aqhMMFEJWiYfQBuPUpi9s4IWzpHsbRNYsvBQvU-pS3hjj3Gb2esElr3_w0Hs4X1MWBzrOoyyHGvkp8lgMY3XNq32mJuUKnIj3m_XeBHNs1rbH6AMXvcY5AcqWLpCv/s400/images.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594359906432612386" /></a><br /><br />I mean who doesn't have time to stay at home recreating a miniature Buckingham Palace to scale and knitting the entire royal family?<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbJcF3HrbyOsoqcdMiLklyx1JZ1ag8t7_iNEn_UKVj6Ru_e3Azf9FA-6tJB-jOGzjoguokBJMRTWfZ0YBoUTbWcLp18Z515DffDa4W1NjEcVtB50OZOk1OqvwEfc4BTArC90GOOrFHGWco/s1600/engagement-knit-mdn.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbJcF3HrbyOsoqcdMiLklyx1JZ1ag8t7_iNEn_UKVj6Ru_e3Azf9FA-6tJB-jOGzjoguokBJMRTWfZ0YBoUTbWcLp18Z515DffDa4W1NjEcVtB50OZOk1OqvwEfc4BTArC90GOOrFHGWco/s400/engagement-knit-mdn.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594361662867850162" /></a><br /><br /> <br />While I defintely don't, I may just have time to squeeze in a Pope. Come on.... who could resist?<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrjCZE7UX4E4__Q_taT6cgMcDS35-sdlylztv7dFlhj1al4i6FA4hFB8VS8f1nCnicE8f_YyvfZvOkqL8yV_-aMm8yJeLWAbw2oO_E1030Uc3yNSS4oky-6gMzDRxYPoAHBPnhwouBrAJo/s1600/tumblr_lhvxswBnUm1qh398jo1_400-1.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 289px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrjCZE7UX4E4__Q_taT6cgMcDS35-sdlylztv7dFlhj1al4i6FA4hFB8VS8f1nCnicE8f_YyvfZvOkqL8yV_-aMm8yJeLWAbw2oO_E1030Uc3yNSS4oky-6gMzDRxYPoAHBPnhwouBrAJo/s400/tumblr_lhvxswBnUm1qh398jo1_400-1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594362882027361650" /></a><br /><br />And I'm sure the popemobile would only take me 5<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgzdOW-B8gcRclc6wm1i158TB4w_0zryc_J4anau8IPaEMJ2C5ylI7RQXVVD2IMMfFHvbglH7z8rzm2wVVTLH4htODzIx8mCFeON2cDvkhmJCE8oM2xikh47NoMzgkPH8DEJXryXsu-_rq/s1600/1218124734_SPLASH.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgzdOW-B8gcRclc6wm1i158TB4w_0zryc_J4anau8IPaEMJ2C5ylI7RQXVVD2IMMfFHvbglH7z8rzm2wVVTLH4htODzIx8mCFeON2cDvkhmJCE8oM2xikh47NoMzgkPH8DEJXryXsu-_rq/s400/1218124734_SPLASH.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5594363174512555810" /></a>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-87478843698823816572011-01-11T09:55:00.000-08:002011-01-12T04:13:04.722-08:00THE DELIGHTS of NAIROBI CITY MARKETI lay down my shield and spear, and can remove my raincoat. The long quest to find the most charming rings in the world is now over. <br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMorshILSKQmSg1gPVSEIPXMqC8dr8G9yRxQSBKNx8ACeEO5x-S1A_Hzwlf5thjcDSBCWkR82Sd6PsGPPOrswetOHj9et3TdK9STCSabpJn4K0lT9JByPEDsrbU_l1Mn6KWdi1yKUbDzyn/s1600/IMG_0570.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMorshILSKQmSg1gPVSEIPXMqC8dr8G9yRxQSBKNx8ACeEO5x-S1A_Hzwlf5thjcDSBCWkR82Sd6PsGPPOrswetOHj9et3TdK9STCSabpJn4K0lT9JByPEDsrbU_l1Mn6KWdi1yKUbDzyn/s400/IMG_0570.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560994334316597874" /></a><br /><br />I shall go home now.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTy_6jlRuBto_1V6SW3DuIS42xbA5P_CyNZiNbCuzPxKELg_Lu5dNTRMTStnglSuehrFRcjmYwlBjDAZdignXqpC9-g24Tylp6DcB3zKMAy3Fl1tUg91_xlf1IkaD638fTfuoD5AJW1QxZ/s1600/IMG_0577.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTy_6jlRuBto_1V6SW3DuIS42xbA5P_CyNZiNbCuzPxKELg_Lu5dNTRMTStnglSuehrFRcjmYwlBjDAZdignXqpC9-g24Tylp6DcB3zKMAy3Fl1tUg91_xlf1IkaD638fTfuoD5AJW1QxZ/s400/IMG_0577.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560994354758269554" /></a>Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4390694479848699499.post-14071346522631817372011-01-11T08:55:00.000-08:002011-05-24T10:00:54.986-07:00Kamogi, Kenya! www.kamogi.com<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigO9m4Hd-m6Kd3QIorEJf3zpelaWp8okD-zrlIImwpmLMmUsoBfHqsoZU1S3lYlkqYpnm2LSUiR-bmSceOSMmpbTHDXGI4lFBxei15OFnfeeqOPH8Kr9uaDMYSHY6Zqed3JPy-oGnEnmcP/s1600/IMG_0434.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigO9m4Hd-m6Kd3QIorEJf3zpelaWp8okD-zrlIImwpmLMmUsoBfHqsoZU1S3lYlkqYpnm2LSUiR-bmSceOSMmpbTHDXGI4lFBxei15OFnfeeqOPH8Kr9uaDMYSHY6Zqed3JPy-oGnEnmcP/s320/IMG_0434.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560976311276890914" /></a><br /><br />If you ever stay at Kamogi Ranch in Kenya, I can highly recommend sleeping in one of these. When I say one, I mean one... not two... Ah - the romance of the bush.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-4pd-21aUVF7yxmIYOJsfsZNLgrB2yQgAp1wMOxoylCfJ5PimcwUqjD31MNmerra61MEYXdihTOfAQssRBpRVN4sp4ZXw8W0gTY7JyeCEA0Nv5pEJAVJri-vuiV11HJ7-Pq9BSYp0rcW5/s1600/IMG_0410.JPG"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-4pd-21aUVF7yxmIYOJsfsZNLgrB2yQgAp1wMOxoylCfJ5PimcwUqjD31MNmerra61MEYXdihTOfAQssRBpRVN4sp4ZXw8W0gTY7JyeCEA0Nv5pEJAVJri-vuiV11HJ7-Pq9BSYp0rcW5/s320/IMG_0410.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560975010860988034" /></a><br /><br />Arrrrrghhhhh!!! Romance besides, if you've come across one of these just moments before the sun goes down, I'll give you £100 if you dare sleep alone.<br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEsBEXCTYcfQVjceDzD9DV2FWU0lhBwk5YWNGXltHw3lf0qXbWnkLexxXfrlb7XddCltHb8K_vimlBXFqdY9ERzeeFOYTgULRFEufvjbw7iB4uUj2ucYdkJUIMOaqK_KYYe32RYm78wH4f/s1600/IMG_0420.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEsBEXCTYcfQVjceDzD9DV2FWU0lhBwk5YWNGXltHw3lf0qXbWnkLexxXfrlb7XddCltHb8K_vimlBXFqdY9ERzeeFOYTgULRFEufvjbw7iB4uUj2ucYdkJUIMOaqK_KYYe32RYm78wH4f/s320/IMG_0420.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560981179468031666" /></a><br /><br />T-rex perhaps?Violet Naylor-Leylandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03033851632001202208noreply@blogger.com0